Of Daylights and Darkenings
by Magician April Aries
Summary: Natsume, Mikan, Hotaru and Ruka discover that there are two sides to every coin, that love is a supreme sacrifice, that people need each other in the darkness, and that sometimes it's worth risking everything just to end it. Discontinued.
1. Blue Scarf

Part One:

Chapter One: Blue Scarf

Persona waited. Approximately ten minutes had already passed—he was sure to appear any second now. He felt somewhat annoyed. It was already quarter to five, for heaven's sake, and Natsume had to be back at the Academy soon. The boy was dawdling. He hadn't been like this before. For heaven's sake, did he think he was still ten years old? Come to think of it, what kind of a mentor had to put up with a pupil who was better at ten than fifteen?

Well, he'd be turning up soon enough. Persona wasn't at all worried that something had happened to him.

He wasn't disappointed; in a moment, a boy wearing a black cat mask over his face appeared behind him. "You're slowing down," Persona stated, noting a small cut on the side of Natsume's face.

"I'm fine," the student said, irritated, gingerly touching the mark where it had gone through the mask. His voice was slightly muffled. "They're gone, the mission's over. Isn't that what's important?"

"Go back to the Academy," Persona instructed as though he hadn't heard a word of what he'd just said. "Wait until I call for you again."

Natsume pulled off the mask, letting the night air hit his face. "What's that?" Persona suddenly said sharply.

"What're you—hey, get away," Natsume said angrily as his mentor took hold of one end of his bright blue scarf and forced him to put the mask back on.

It was clumsily knit and obviously handmade—after all, no self-respecting store would have sold something like that. "Where'd you pick this trash up?" Persona snorted. "You know better than to wear things like this on a mission, it's a dead giveaway of your location, anyone can spot this from a mile away."

"Shut up," Natsume said, moving away. "It's none of your bloody business. I'll wear whatever I like, whether it's a scarf or a fruit-covered hat and a coconut-shell bikini." The mask administered a shock for his cheek, but he felt it was well worth it. "Why should it matter to you, as long as I do the dirty work and haul the garbage out?"

"Stop," Persona commanded. The boy kept walking, but the electric shock from the mask made him freeze in his tracks.

He took the scarf from him. It had Natsume's name awkwardly embroidered on the inside of it. The boy glared at him, yanking the material from Persona's hands.

"I see," Persona said softly. "So that little pet girl of yours gave it to you, then? I have to say that I don't see what's so special about her—or her little gift. It looks like a three-year-old made it."

Natsume said nothing, but a malevolent spark lit up in his eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about," he said evenly. "It's pathetic, I know. I don't wear it if I can help it. I was just… cold," he finished lamely.

"It was just a stupid Christmas present from one of my classmates and happened to be the first thing I grabbed." His cheeks flushed, and he was suddenly glad that Persona had put the mask back on him.

The boy was a good liar, but he wasn't good enough to keep the little tremor out of his voice. "Go back to the school," Persona said. He watched the boy disappear, jumping from tree to tree stealthily. But his footsteps were slower, his mind focused on other things.

Clearly something had to be done.

In one room at the Alice Academy, the light was still burning brightly as a pigtailed girl scribbled on a piece of note paper in lopsided, childish handwriting. She'd been putting off writing it earlier while she was out with her friends, but she'd promised herself to have it ready to be sent off by tomorrow.

_Dear Grandpa, _

_Things are going on as usual in the Alice Academy. I've been doing well with my lessons—Hotaru and Ruka and Yuu help me out a lot, so I manage to pass all my tests, although Hotaru usually whines a lot. She'll never admit that she does and I'll never tell, but Hotaru whines quite a lot._

_It seems almost impossible that I've been here for five years already. Time really flies by, doesn't it? I miss you. I haven't seen you for such a long time, and I wonder how you're doing—I just hope that you're doing fine._

_I really miss you, grandpa. Things are so confusing here. It isn't that I'm not happy; I don't want to offend you, but I don't think I could ever be quite this happy if I enrolled in a public middle school back home. It isn't that I wouldn't want to be with you, but I really love it here at the Academy. When I first got here, I was miserable, but now I really feel as though they accept me. I have such great friends._

_Speaking of friends, I'm worried about one in particular—although I'm not sure if he really _is _my friend. It's Hyuuga Natsume… I sent you earlier letters about him, as you might remember. And while he's not as unbearable as he used to be, he's changed. I can't quite describe it._

_Sometimes I think that we're really good friends because he does or says something nice, and then suddenly he insults me or worse, ignores me altogether. I'm worried about him. I'll never tell him, of course. He hates it when he makes people anxious._

_He always says that he can take care of things alone and that he doesn't need anyone else—that's what worries me. It's the things that come out of his mouth. He doesn't seem to know exactly how horrible what he's saying is._

_I guess I'm being a little meddlesome, grandpa. He says that he doesn't want to be worried about; but I do, and he's really cheeky about it too. Don't worry; he hasn't done anything to upset me—well, not really, anyway. _

_I hope that you write back soon, grandpa. I really, really miss you!_

_Love,_

_Mikan_

With a tiny smile, she folded it and stuffed it into an envelope. Turning to look outside the window one last time before she went to sleep, she looked sadly down at a boy in a black mask entering the Academy gates and making his way into his dorm building.

Natsume fingered the scarf hanging around his neck. It made him think back to last Christmas. He hadn't liked it much. There was all that hubbub around him, and those soppy girls forcing presents on him, cluttering up his room with useless things. Usually he dumped them in the rubbish bin, unopened, or used them for target practice.

He only ever gave presents to a few people—Ruka and Yoichi, in fact, were the only ones who basked in his largesse, such as that purebred dog that he gave to Ruka and a real silver watch he gave to Yoichi last Christmas. He never spent his money on anything much anyway, and was glad for an excuse to make those two happy.

Although he never saw the point in buying things that were so expendable; those things weren't necessary, they were just there to be appreciated, and he never understood that—well, they made them briefly happy, whatever he might say about it.

"_Hey Natsume, merry Christmas!" _

"_What do you want, polka dots?"_

"_I'll let that slide, just this once. It's Christmas! How can you be so gloomy on Christmas?"_

"_Bah, humbug."_

"_Here's your present."_

"_I don't have anything for you. Would you stop giving me all this stuff already? I tell you every year that I don't want anything from you. I don't know whether you're optimistic to the point of stupidity or just stupid, but—"_

"_I don't care what you say. Friends make stuff for each other."_

"_You're _not _my friend."_

"_Whatever. Open it. Do you like it?"_

"_This tacky thing? I pity the sheep you murdered to make this godforsaken crap If you're going to kill the thing, the least you could do is make something decent out of it."_

"_But I stayed up all night last week just to make it for you!"_

He let his hand drop down his side, remembering his reply: _"I guess I needed something to clean my shoes with anyway, if they're even worth that much."_ He didn't regret saying that, not in the least. It was better that she thought that he despised her. He did, in his own fashion.

She had taken no offense, just smiled and said, _"Well, as long as you keep it, I don't mind. I'm not too good with knitting, but I tried my best and if you keep it, I'm happy."_

He let out a long, shuddering breath. That girl crawled under his skin, insinuated herself into his dreams in ways that he would rather not tell anyone. There was no space in his life for silly infatuations.

How could someone be so ridiculously happy? She had that annoying little grin permanently plastered to her face, and it shook him. She smiled no matter what. It made him want to shake _her. _He could insult her a million times over and she would stand there with that stupid, silly grin of hers. It made him feel like screaming in her face and wiping that irritating smirk off because there it was—reality was nothing to smile about.

He had quashed his growing obsession for five years now, but it was undeniably _there._


	2. The Solution

Chapter Two: The Solution

It was business as usual in the classroom. Anna and Nonoko were blathering on about something with Kokoroyomi; Sumire was sitting with the other members of the Natsume and Ruka Fan Club, discussing invasion tactics and swapping pictures that they'd snatched at odd moments, thought most of them were bought from Hotaru at exorbitant fees. But Ruka was sitting alone, his pet rabbit sitting stiffly in his arms.

"Hey, where's Natsume?" Hotaru asked him as she passed by his desk, her dark hair falling into her eyes. Lately she was in need of a haircut, but she let it grow and grow because she claimed that she didn't have time for it. Eventually, Ruka was sure, she would get fed up with it getting in the way all the time and hack at it with a pair of scissors in the bathroom.

Ruka hated to admit that he didn't know where his best friend was, so he simply said, "Around. Where's Mikan?"

"That idiot's always late," Hotaru replied, although her hazy purple eyes drifted over to the door. "Bet you fifty rabbits that your best friend shows up before mine."

"No way, he got in around morning." That much Ruka knew; every night, he posted little animal sentries to alert him when Natsume came in, and the raven that stopped by his window had come only a few hours before classes. He was sure that his friend hadn't gotten in at least until four or five.

She arched an eyebrow. "What's the matter, late night at the pub? Off hitting the keg somewhere? And in any case, it doesn't matter. Mikan will still be later than he is."

Ruka bit his lip and considered. When he wasn't cutting classes, Natsume was practically obsessive-compulsive about following schedules and having things in apple-pie order. "Bet not."

"Prove it. Fifty rabbits."

Natsume entered the classroom, looking as though he'd just rolled out of bed, his hair sticking up in all directions and his eyes plainly showing that he hadn't slept at all. He still managed to carry it off admirably, though.

Hotaru smiled at Ruka, although she was much too dignified to gloat. "Pay up."

"Should have known better than to bet with you," he grumbled. "You never lose."

"That," she said confidently as she pocketed his money, "is part of my infinite charm and appeal."

"Are you okay, Natsume?" Ruka asked as he noted the thin scar on Natsume's cheek and the bleak exhaustion that darkened his face.

"I'm fine," the other boy said, putting his comic book over his face and his feet on the desk. "Just let me sleep a bit, Ruka."

Mikan entered the classroom. "Good morning!" she said, smiling. "Hi Hotaru, Ruka… Natsume," she added after a moment of hesitation.

"Late as usual," her best friend said coldly. "Honestly, why do you take so long in the mornings anyway? You can't _possibly _be deliberating about your looks—I mean, what with you coming in looking like that."

Mikan scowled, her cheeks turning an angry shade of red, but Natsume interrupted, "Don't bother reasoning with polka-dot girl. She's too stupid to understand anything." He put his comic book down with a yawn.

"Stop picking on—"

But she was cut short when Natsume suddenly looked past her, getting to his feet.

A man with dark hair pulled into a ponytail and deep purplish eyes entered the classroom, the many control devices on his fingers glittering under the fluorescent lights. "Isn't he the guy who gave us our test before?" Mikan recalled, looking at Natsume's tense face. "Five years ago?"

"That's him, all right," Ruka said, frowning. "But I haven't seen him around the campus since then—until now. Have you guys?" Mikan and Hotaru both shook their heads.

"Your normal substitute teacher just suffered from a nervous breakdown," he explained from up front. ("Probably because we locked him up in that cage yesterday," whispered Kokoroyomi, and his classmates sniggered.) "And Mr. Narumi has business to attend to outside the school. Therefore I'll be in charge of your class today. Your first class is math, right?"

Everyone nodded, silently exchanging looks with each other; was this guy a pushover and could they pull the same stunts they normally did on _him_ like they had on their other teachers? He didn't look it. But on the other hand, he didn't seem to be the Mr. Jinno type either—no-nonsense strict with punishment immediately at hand.

In fact, he didn't seem remotely like any of their teachers. He didn't seem normal at all. Especially when he added, "But let's skip that. I never really saw the point of algebra anyway."

They stared at him in disbelief. "You mean… we won't have classes?" Anna asked uncertainly.

"I didn't say that," he said. "Ignore math for now. This is Alice Academy, after all—we're special." Natsume bristled at his words. They were a far cry from his typical teachings of "Just because you're an Alice doesn't mean that you don't have to follow my orders, little boy. Just because you have powers doesn't mean that you're not a murderer." He glared, and Persona smirked, amused.

"What do we care about the ordinary and mundane things that non-Alices have to learn? How about an Alice demonstration instead? I'll even give the winner a prize."

"Like what?" Sumire asked, ears perking up.

"Oh, I'll let the winners join a very special… _club_, for want of a better term," he purred. "It's extremely exclusive."

"No," Natsume said at once, his voice cutting through the cheerful buzz of his excited classmates. They were all idiots. They didn't know what kind of 'club' he was talking about.

"Be quiet, Mr. Hyuuga. You're not going to join." The voice brooked no arguments, and Natsume shut up when he noticed the cat mask just barely visible behind the flower vase on the desk. "After all, you're already in the… club."

"Ruka, don't you dare participate," Natsume hissed through his teeth. "If you get killed, I'll murder you."

"Kind of defeats the purpose…" Ruka whispered back with a nervous laugh.

"Mr. Nogi! How about you come up to the front first?" he called out. Ruka glanced at Natsume's furious face. "Or I could call someone else…" He looked pointedly over at Mikan and Hotaru. Ruka and Natsume didn't miss the connection.

"No, no," Ruka said, getting to his feet immediately. "I'm cool with it." He felt the room getting hotter and saw Natsume's red eyes burning into the teacher's.

"Ruka…"

"I'll be fine," the blonde boy said.

Natsume shook his head as his friend made his way up to the front. He wasn't fine. None of them were.

Mikan watched Natsume's face carefully. "Are you okay?" They were only twenty minutes into the battle, but everyone except her had already participated. So far she hadn't been called yet, but Ruka, Sumire, Yuu and Hotaru had all had their turns and performed well—except for Sumire, who had gotten eliminated by Hotaru's idiot-gun. Ruka had kicked Nonoko's butt, which wasn't surprising considering that she hadn't prepared any of her chemicals for this sort of thing.

"I'm fine," Natsume snapped, rolling his eyes. He kept his eye on Yuu up front, who was busy battling it out with Anna. Not that Anna stood a chance; a cooking Alice wouldn't exactly come in handy in this sort of situation.

He looked so fragile; she took his hand. "Listen, Natsume… if you're worried, you can tell me."

He yanked his hand away from her. "Get lost, little girl," he said, feeling Persona's eyes on him. Who did he think he was kidding, with that so-called disguise? He looked defiantly at him, and he saw the other man smile.

"Miss Sakura, I think you'd do very well here," Persona said smoothly. "With… oh, let's say… any volunteers? I think everyone's had a turn except for you. We'll have to find you someone…"

Natsume caught his eye, but Persona shook his head. "Mr. Hyuuga, as I said, won't be participating in this," he explained. "Oh well, you'll just have to join the next batch of competitors." He pointed over to the ones who'd won in the battles, and Natsume seethed.

If Mikan had fought against someone, she might have lost and gotten back to her seat, back to safety. Persona was _deliberately _making sure that she had to fight in the final matches. He was giving Mikan a wide open field to being a part of that stupid 'club'. He didn't put it past the man to just hand her a weak opponent in the final competitions, either.

"We'll continue this after lunch," he said as the bell rang. Natsume went straight over to Persona, brushing past Ruka and the others.

Ruka started to go after him, but Hotaru grabbed him by the arm and dragged him to the back of the class, far away from them. "Don't," she said.

"You leave them out of this," Natsume said in a low voice.

Persona looked calmly at him from behind the desk. "We need some new recruits, that's all," he said. "You haven't been doing your best on the job lately, so we need some people to pick up the slack." His violet eyes rested on Ruka's fair head.

"No," Natsume said, thinking that he might be ill as he followed Persona's gaze and saw the lingering glance on his best friend. "Not Ruka."

"He's very useful," Persona continued. "Animal boy—attacks with his Alice could be put down to accidents. You have no say in this, Natsume."

"I've been doing my best—"

"But it isn't good enough anymore. The powers that be have decided that the Academy needs someone else to watch its tail. The anti-academy movement's been too much for you to handle, you see," he said, clearly relishing every word of his report.

With a feral smile, he added cruelly, "After all, how can you be at your peak performance when you waste time letting little girls hold your hand?"

Natsume's face purpled with rage, and Persona flipped him the cat mask. "Put it on," he ordered, wiggling his fingers at the vase of flowers and watching them wilt immediately. _Or I'm going to use my Alice on one of your friends_, his actions clearly said. Natsume blanched and slipped it over his face.

"Why do you have to do this?" Natsume said in a bewildered, lost little voice that momentarily dropped their harsh tones. He sounded about eight years old—but at eight, he was already older than he really was. In the few photographs of him at that age, he looked so young, but old eyes peered out from the youthful face.

They were eyes that knew too much, that had seen too much; oblique red tunnels that burned when they turned on you. Now they were transparent, and every emotion that he'd been hiding for so many years exploded like stars on his face in an unguarded moment.

It was the first time he was pleading.


	3. Following Into the Darkness

Chapter Three: Following Into the Darkness

"You're wasting your time, Natsume," Persona said. "In fact, the higher-ups have already decided on a certain person. I just wanted to see who else would be candidates—who else I would be recommending to be put in the force. I figured that since your classmates were so talented, I should monitor them closely. Who knows, they may be joining you."

"If you already know who my partner is going to be, why are you dragging all of them into this?" he said furiously, all trace of his vulnerability vanishing into anger. Good. Persona preferred a spirited resistance by far, compared to that sniveling awhile ago.

Persona looked at him dispassionately. "You never used to be like this, Natsume. You wear your heart on your sleeve. You let your emotions take hold of you—it's so easy to control you. You're not protected, not where they're concerned. So why?"

"Why what?"

"Why stay with them when they don't do anything for you? They're just another obligation to you."

He bared his teeth in a savage smile. He hadn't been Natsume's teacher for nothing; he knew exactly what would break his student. "You have to work constantly to protect them. And yet I can tell that you're insecure about your position as their friend, so you waste even more energy trying to prove yourself to them in different ways while pushing them away at the same time. You can't face them, but you won't leave them."

"Is that why you keep denying that Sakura Mikan and Imaii Hotaru are your friends—while you keep throwing them into situations where they have to be with you?"

Natsume didn't answer. "You know that they'll never accept you, if they knew your other side, Natsume. You're not like them. Why are you forcing it? You can't change who you are."

"You're not a child anymore," he continued. "Listen to me, Natsume. You were never really a child. But the fact is that you're older now and should know better. Stop clinging to these foolish dreams."

"Hey Natsume, are you coming with us for lunch?" Mikan called out from the back of the class.

"Aren't you going to her?" Persona asked. He reached out one hand and before Natsume could stop him, pulled the scarf that Mikan had given him out of his pocket. "I thought you disliked this. If you did, why would you carry it around with you?" He let out a low laugh. "You can't love someone if you have no heart."

Natsume lunged for it, but stopped as the cat mask electrocuted him. _Damn, _he thought. Under normal conditions, he would have taken it like a man—but he had just finished an assignment, he was tired, and he could barely stand right now. He fell limply to the ground.

"Natsume!" Ruka yelled. He and Mikan ran over to him immediately.

"Run along to lunch now," Persona said with a smile as he tossed the scarf back at Natsume's inert body.

"Can't you take that mask off?" Mikan asked him as they all sat in a group underneath the trees.

"No," he said, his words slightly stifled from behind it. "I can't do that. That would just give me another electric shock. And much as I like being all lit up like a Christmas tree, I think I'll pass."

Mikan thought for a moment then took it off him, the black cat revealing an even more inscrutable mask that was Natsume's face. She tried not to look into his empty red eyes. "There, that means that I did it, not you. You told me not to, but I didn't listen. You're entirely blameless. You can just put it back on later."

"You could get into trouble—"

She cut him off. "We'll worry about that later."

Hotaru rolled her eyes. "Typical Mikan, never planning in advance."

Ruka glared at the windows of their classroom, where he could just make out Persona's silhouette. "I hate him," he said bitterly. "I'd like to pay him back for what he did to Natsume."

"It's not your fight," Natsume snapped, his tone flat. "Stay out of it."

His friend drew back as though he'd just been slapped. "I'm sorry. I just wish you'd let me share your problem."

"Feh," the black-haired boy said.

"Feh?" Hotaru repeated, bemused.

"It's Jewish," he said with an unfazed smirk, glad that he was doing well in changing the subject. "Its origin is a really good story—no, scrap that. It's not really a good story, just an extremely long one. Do you want to hear it? It involves a toffee hammer, a blender and a topless—"

"You can't say that it isn't our fight, Natsume," Mikan interrupted. He scowled; leave it to her to remind them all about it. "He's making it ours too. Would you stop being so full of yourself and realize that we should have a say in it too?"

"You have no idea what its like," Natsume said. Even lit with anger, her eyes were innocent and trusting. She was such a kid! Even at fifteen, she was as much an idiot as ever. Did she really think that she could save someone?

He didn't want to be saved anyway, not when he'd chosen to damn himself. "Don't talk about what you don't know."

"Then LET ME KNOW! Don't you at least owe us that?"

They glared at each other. "Ruka, could you come with me for a second?" Hotaru asked abruptly, dragging him away before he had a chance to answer.

There was a moment of awkward silence. Natsume and Mikan looked at each other. "Natsume, I'm sorry if I was a bit short-tempered," she said. "The thing is… I'm worried about you."

"Huh? There's no reason for you to worry about _me_. I'd be more worried for Hotaru and Ruka if I were you."

"I _am _worried about them. But…"

The bell rang again. "Looks like we'd better get back," Mikan sat at length.

He caught her by the hand. "Listen," he said, "I don't want you guys getting hurt. I want you to promise me that you won't listen to what he says, no matter what… Mikan."

She looked at him, startled at the sound of his lips shaping her name, as he had done only once before. "Natsume—"

"Promise me."

Their eyes locked. "Don't look into the darkness if you don't have to," he reminded her. "I told you that five years ago. Why do you have to keep stumbling off into a place that would suffocate you?"

"But you're there," she said. "And you need someone to be there with you."

He looked away, all the unguarded worry stripped away and covered up. "I don't need anyone," he snarled. "Get going to class, strawberry-girl." He put his mask back on. "I can stand alone."

Hotaru yawned as she used her idiot gun on Yuu, who was such a softie that it was no problem finishing him off. "Thank you, Miss Imaii, you may go back to your seat," Persona said as he scribbled her name down on a clipboard. "Very well done."

There were only three of them left: Hotaru, Ruka and Mikan—the first two were no surprise, but Mikan managed to beat Kokoroyomi by using her nullifying Alice against his mind-reading skill. Natsume glowered at them up front. Persona was crafty. If he had paired Mikan up with Hotaru or Yuu or even Ruka, then she would have lost for sure. But _no, _he just _had _to put her up against the one guy who was sure to lose to her.

"The three of you will be competing against each other next," Persona said, smiling at Natsume.

"Wait a minute. Does this exclusive club entail labor?" Hotaru asked, examining her fingernails.

"Yes," Persona said. She turned up her nose. "But it also means moving up a star rank and getting a special allowance from the school."

Hotaru smirked and brought out her idiot gun. "No problem, then."

Persona called on Kokoroyomi. "I want you to read their minds," he said into the boy's ear. After a minute, Kokoroyomi looked expectantly back up at the teacher, who now raised his voice to normal. "Very good. Now I want you to tell me who they were thinking off exactly at that moment."

"Ruka and Mikan were thinking of Natsume. Hotaru was thinking about the money she would make if she won," Kokoroyomi announced. Ruka and Mikan both exchanged that's-so-typical-of-Hotaru looks.

"All right," Persona said. "It'll be like this. I want you all to do this individually. You have to prevent me from using my Alice on Natsume and get him out of the classroom within one minute. Whoever wins will be joining the club."

"No way!" Natsume blurted out, then fell silent as the mask administered him a shock. The class started muttering about how sick it was that the school was controlling him that way, but Persona started taking off his control rings with a perfectly calm air.

"I'm asking you three to do the best that you possibly can," he said dangerously as he left only one on each hand. "My Alice is quite powerful. Natsume would find it quite unpleasant if I used it on him."

He led the four out of the classroom, leaving strict instructions to the other students not to go out and to behave themselves. They settled into a shaded area in the Northern Forest, Natsume dragging his feet unwillingly.

"Don't do it, Ruka," Natsume called out at the last moment, and then shut up again as this time the buzz of the shock was clearly audible. It must have been particularly painful, because he slumped on the grass, knocked unconscious.

Persona moved towards Natsume and placed his hands hovering in the air a few inches above the boy's shoulders. "I'm waiting," he said sweetly. He batted aside Ruka's crow like it was nothing, and to Ruka's shock the bird dropped to the floor—dead.

"What did you do?" Ruka shouted, running over to it. He watched in horror as it turned into ash and was quickly blown away by the wind before he could even reach it. Persona shrugged.

"I suggest that you hurry, Ruka," he said. "You three don't have much time." Hotaru fired her new and improved idiot cannon, but he caught all of the ammo and watched them turn to dust in his hands.

"A pity, Miss Imaii. But I believe that you two would do quite well in the club regardless of your failure to save Natsume." His eyes turned on Mikan. "Go ahead. Do your best. Or I _will _use my Alice on him."

_Don't look into the darkness…_

Natsume, you need someone there to be with you! Don't you understand even that? Won't you at the very least give us a choice?

_Promise me you won't listen to him…_

She charged Persona. _I'm sorry, Natsume, I can't promise. _She tackled him, knocking him over. "You're twisted!" she said, tears collecting at the corners of her eyes. She felt so angry that life had handed Natsume this big icky deal on a platter. He'd never had a choice. Well, she was making hers.

Persona reached out and put a hand on her shoulder, but nothing happened. She felt herself get dizzy, but she ignored it, fighting it off while concentrating on her Nullification Alice. Instead, she broke free and hurried over to Natsume, tearing his mask off.

_You're there… and you need someone to be there with you. _She glared at Persona as Ruka rushed over too.

"Thank you, Miss Sakura," Persona said. "Mikan. I'm going to speak to Mr. Narumi about this so that we can make some arrangements. You're quite promising."


	4. Prices

Chapter Four: Prices

"Natsume?"

He opened his eyes and found Mikan's upside-down face looking at him. "What the hell are you doing?" he asked, pushing himself up into a sitting position and realizing that his head had been lying on her lap when he knocked his forehead on her chin and she gave a little yelp.

"Are you all right?" Ruka asked, his stormy blue eyes filled with concern and self-reproach. "It's all my fault, Natsume. I couldn't stop him. Even when I knew that he was going to do whatever he said he would." He clenched his hands into fists. "I was so… _helpless._"

Hotaru said nothing, instead tinkering with something in her idiot cannon, but the pucker in her mouth clearly said that she hadn't won either. Natsume felt a wave of relief wash over him. "So no one…?"

"Mikan stopped him," Hotaru said, keeping her eyes on the wires she was crossing. "She charged him like the clumsy ox that she is. He tried using his Alice on her but she cancelled it out. The contest was obviously fixed so that she would win. I can't believe that she'll become a two-star student now."

He sat still. "And then what happened?" he said harshly, his voice coming out in a ragged gasp.

"He said that he would be talking to Mr. Narumi, so that they could make some arrangements or something," Mikan said. He stared at her in disbelief. It was a complete nightmare.

"You… _idiot,"_ he said in a hiss, looking as though he was just inches away from striking her. "Do you have any idea what you just did?"

"I do," she said, blinking back tears. He realized that her cheeks were wet. "I can't help it, Natsume. I know you're going to tell me that I'm going to regret it and all that, but I couldn't just watch him do it to you. I couldn't promise."

Hotaru grabbed Ruka's arm. "Let's ask Nonoko for something that'll help Natsume recover faster," she said quickly, dragging him away, leaving Natsume and Mikan alone again. Natsume was beginning to sense a pattern here, but he didn't say anything.

"Natsume—"

"Spare me. Just spare me, okay?" he said, glaring at her. "I don't want any of your bleeding-heart speeches about how much I need someone and how I shouldn't be afraid of that and more of your mushy blah-blah."

She colored, patches of color flushing her cheeks an angry red. "Actually, I was going to ask you to help me. You're right; I don't know much about what I need to know here. But you do. And I'm asking you to teach me."

"You're persistent. I hate persistent people."

"Can't you just think about it?" she pleaded.

He hesitated, tapping his chin thoughtfully. "Oh, very well… right, I thought about it, and the answer's still no."

He felt a stab of guilt but forced himself to be cold. "Give me a good reason," he said. "I don't see why I should tell you after you wouldn't listen to me."

"I don't want to die, Natsume, that's why. There's still so much that I haven't done that I want to do. I know that what I just went into is dangerous. If you tell me what I need to know, I'll have that much of a chance better at survival. Because I don't want to leave this life yet. You, on the other hand," she said bitterly, "know a lot, but you don't seem to give a damn whether you live or not. The least you can do is respect the wishes of someone who does."

He paused. "Okay, come with me."

"I've never used my Nullification Alice on purpose before," Mikan explained to him. "Not consciously, I mean. Usually it's just dumb luck that it works—or desperation."

"Or both," he said.

"Where're we going anyway?" she asked as he led her through the Northern Forest, moving deep into it. She'd never been in these parts before, not even when Natsume had first initiated her into the Academy by forcing her to walk through it.

"To Persona."

"Who's he?"

He paused, arching an eyebrow at her. She had never seen another guy able to raise just one eyebrow before—he was the first. "He was the one testing you just awhile ago."

"And we're going to _him_? After all those disgusting things he did to you?" she said, horrified. "I never want to see his horrible face again! And he's short," she added as a sulky afterthought, clearly forgetting that she wasn't all that tall herself.

"We don't have a choice." He stopped at a large rock with three willow trees on either side of it. He kicked lightly at the second one on its right and then tugged the branch of the third tree on the left.

A door appeared in the ground, its silvery knob shining faintly in black wood. "And you forget that he has the most miraculous invention of mankind at hand—platform boots."

She shook her head slowly. "I just can't believe you sometimes, Natsume. How can you face someone who's so horrible to you?"

"The trick to being around Persona is not inhaling."

"Handy," Mikan quipped nervously with a smothered laugh as she followed him down a narrow flight of stairs and through a labyrinth of corridors. Natsume turned everything into a joke. He didn't give a damn whether it was the right moment to be rude or not—he didn't seem to give a rat's ass about anything and would probably die tap-dancing and swearing like a rap star. "Have any other Alices come down here?"

"Yeah. Some. But never anyone else from our class—until now," he said. "You're the first since me." His red eyes glowed in the darkness. "You must never—_ever_—tell anyone about this. Not even Ruka and Hotaru."

Not tell Hotaru? She swallowed hard. She had to. He trusted her with this information. And in any case, it was probably even worse him, not telling Ruka about it when Ruka told him everything. No wonder Natsume was so horrible most of the time. "That much I can promise," she agreed. "I won't tell either of them."

"Good going, polka-dots," he said. "You'd better stick to that promise."

"I'm not polka-dots," she said hotly. "Why don't you try using my name more often?" _Like awhile ago, _she added in silence, her cheeks flaring up red and her pulse rushing. He could feel it even from the short distance he was walking ahead of her as it pounded near the surface of her skin—he had trained himself to listen to every little sound, to hear noises in the darkness.

He didn't answer as they came to a stop in front of a large oak door. He opened it and walked in.

"You know I ask you to knock, Natsume," Persona said. He was in his normal attire now; a white mask and long black coat, and Natsume was thankful that he'd given up the ridiculous disguise he'd adopted earlier on.

He loathed seeing Persona like that; the man could look almost normal when he tried, and that was one thing that Natsume knew Persona would never be: normal. "Good thing that you're here, we have an assignment for you again later and—"

He glanced fleetingly at the girl behind him before his focus snapped back to Natsume, thoughts calculating quickly in his head. He switched tactics on barely a beat.

"Oh good, you brought your little pet kitten with the different aura here. That's nice. Taking her around for the tour?"

"You know," Natsume said conversationally, "you should really consider taking anger management classes instead of taking it out on other people in your perverse, sadistic ways."

Persona grinned. "I was going to the trouble of calling another Alice from the school, but seeing as she's already a member of the undercover agents and I'm not feeling up to going all the way there again… she'll have to do for the moment."

"What do you mean she'll do?" Natsume asked, eyes narrowing into slits. "Do for what?"

"I told you, you have a mission," he said patiently, as though he was explaining something to a particularly dim toddler. "We can't send you off alone again. As I've told you, your recent performance isn't up to scratch. This job's too important to screw up. Therefore you need someone to watch your back. She happened to be here at the right time."

Mikan's jaw dropped open. "An assignment?" She wondered fleetingly what Natsume did. Come to think of it, back then, when she, Natsume and Sumire had been kidnapped by Reo and the rest of the Anti-Alice Organization, Reo had spoken of Natsume doing 'dirty work' for the Academy.

He'd even insinuated that Natsume was working for big corporations or something like that, anyway. But she had no idea exactly what the boy did. She realized, looking at him, that even after five years… there was another part of his life that she had barely been aware of.

"I…"

Natsume shot her a hard look that clearly meant, _don't say anything. Let _me _handle it. _She shut up abruptly.

"You can't just pick her! She doesn't know anything yet," Natsume argued, his face turning alternately white and red. "She could get killed!"

"That's part of the job," Persona said softly. "The lives of the ones she loves are on the line here."

"You don't have a hold on her," Natsume said, thinking of his own sister and grimacing inwardly. Oh, Persona would find a way to put her under his control, one way or another. He knew that all too well.

"I beg to differ," Persona said, a queer smile on his lips. "Her best friend… I believe the name is Hotaru?"


	5. Epiphanies

Chapter Five: Epiphanies

"Hotaru, hurry up already," Ruka complained as he made his way over to Nonoko's dorm. She picked her way lazily through the labyrinth of corridors. "I thought we were going to get something for Natsume."

She sighed. "You're such a dimwit, Ruka," she said, hitting him with her idiot cannon and knocking him into a balcony where she followed him. The shots were a lot more powerful now, and he was knocked into the wall. She felt the cannon's stronger recoil and smiled down at it. "Hmm. I see that my adjustments worked."

"I just wanted to give Natsume and Mikan some privacy, so they could talk—and anyway, I saw them through the window and they were walking away somewhere towards the forest; they're long gone by now. Didn't you realize that yet?"

"What?" he sputtered. "You mean you set them up?"

"Good Lord. And they said you were smart," she said, rolling her eyes and hitting him again, this time nearly sending him hurtling off the balcony. She twisted a thick leather cuff around and around on her left wrist; she had taken to wearing it recently. "Listen, Ruka, I know that you like Mikan. But when are you going to tell her?"

He flushed. "I don't know," he said in a small voice.

"Then you're an idiot. Natsume will get her, then," she said decisively, reloading her idiot cannon. "He needs her anyway. It's too bad, because you would treat her better. But if you insist on acting like an idiot, I guess there isn't much of a choice here."

"Don't you have any feelings, Hotaru?" Ruka asked, scowling and rubbing the red mark that her idiot cannon had made on his forehead. "It's kind of hard to blurt out that you like someone."

She shrugged as though she didn't care. "How should I know? All I like is money. I hate people," she said bitterly. "After a while you get kind of desensitized about everything."

"Hotaru?" he said uncertainly.

She rolled her eyes. "But I do know that if you insist on waiting around like this, you'll never get Mikan. She's really stupid about things like these—until you tell her, she won't realize it because she's so damn dense, in case you haven't already noticed it already after five years of lolling about with her jerking you and Natsume around on strings. If you want something, reach out and take it, or someone else will!"

"All right, all right, I get the message," he said glumly. He glared at her. "You know, you can really be moral garbage sometimes."

"You say that like it's a bad thing. I don't know what you two see in her anyway," Hotaru said with a yawn. "She's stupid and clumsy and—"

Ruka half-smiled. "I wish you wouldn't put on that act," he said wistfully.

"What act?" she said, frowning.

"I've seen Natsume do it so many times," he said. "He pretends not to care, even when he does. Mikan's your best friend. You love her, in your own way."

Hotaru hit him with her idiot cannon again. "Don't pretend to know me," she said, looking eerily like Natsume.

Miles away from the Academy, one girl was observing a dark head bent over in concentration when her thoughts were abruptly cut off. "Hey, are you done yet?" a lazy voice drawled. "You're taking forever there. Can't you concentrate?"

"I can't now." One brown eye opened and the girl stepped down lightly from a series of stone steps, her hair clinging to her face in wet tendrils. She put her hands on her hips and faced the boy lounging lazily in front of her. She'd warned them not to disturb her during training. All of them knew that this was an absolute must. Shizuka would kill him if she found out. "What's up?"

"It's Shizuka and Yamazaki."

"And…? I thought they'd gone off for a mission."

The boy hesitated. "That's the thing. Apparently they've been captured. Reo said that he was going to go after them tonight," he added in a rush. "And I'm sure that if anyone can get them back, it's Reo."

"Right. Like how he got Hyuuga Natsume five years ago?"

"_Don't _bring that up again," he said angrily. "You know that Reo can be a bit on the rough-and-ready side. But so what? He's more capable than most of the softies around the organization. And besides, can you honestly tell me that you aren't a bit… _involved _in this?"

"For heavens sake, I don't even know him."

His lips curled up in a half-exasperated sneer, but the intense look of calm confidence in her eyes made him eventually look away. "I don't understand how Shizuka could possibly get captured."

"It's simple," she said, exhaling slowly. Already she was making her way back up to the steps. "If Yamazaki got captured, she would fight until he got free. And if she couldn't do that, she would allow herself to get caught too. Shizuka and Yamazaki would never leave each other behind."

"Bad policy," the other boy said with an air of superiority. "Reo would never—"

"Reo this, Reo that," she said, shaking her head. "Is this why you're so hard-hearted?"

His eyes flashed quicksilver. "No," he said. "Maybe it's because the one thing that I want…"

"Is the one thing that you can't have," she finished. "Enough. Where's your girlfriend?"

"She's outside, waiting," he admitted grudgingly. "Are you going back for more?"

"I have to train."

He rolled his eyes. "Training. Right. For your so-called 'training', I find it puzzling that you see that same face all the time."

Her voice was soft. "Have you been away to England for so long that you cannot comprehend the concept of an _en_?"

"Yeah, yeah. An _en _is a karmic bond that stretches across all boundaries, blah, blah, the usual crap. But I notice that you aren't denying it."

"You should be training too."

"I'm done," he said haughtily.

"One thing you'll never die of is overtraining," she said, shaking her head. He watched her for a moment as she let a jet of water cascade over her head, wincing as he rapidly calculated the crushing pressure that must have been drumming on her skull. The unconcern on the pale face unnerved him.

Quietly he slipped out, wondering where her thoughts were—and fleetingly he almost saw into her mind as her hand reached out and faltered at the last moment to catch at Hyuuga Natsume's arm.

Midnight. It could never be anything else, could it? Natsume rolled his eyes. They were being unreasonably melodramatic about the whole thing, as they always were—but he was used to it. It was already quarter to twelve, and he had arranged to meet up with Mikan at the hideout, as he liked to call it—Persona's meeting quarters for the undercover agents, really.

He found her there, outside the entrance, sleeping peacefully. It was probably past her normal bedtime, and he couldn't help but roll his eyes. He bent down to poke her awake. "Hey," he said, shaking her lightly. "Come on. We've got to get moving."

She barely stirred. "Mmm," she said sleepily, turning onto her side. Damn her—showing off the ethereal firefly glow that illuminated the curve of her hand, silhouetted against the moon, the light tracing the curlicues of her eyelashes down her cheek.

"She looks too cute to wake up," he groaned softly, wrenching his hand away from her shoulder with an effort.

"Cute? Debatable," he heard from behind him. Persona emerged from the staircase with two other students, both from the high school division. "Wake her up, or you'll be late, Natsume."

"Yeah, yeah," he grumbled, pretending that Persona hadn't heard the involuntary words that had escaped him. He woke her up with a sharp rap on the head. "Wake up, you idiot."

She sat up abruptly, rubbing the spot where he'd hit her. "You didn't have to do that," she said, scowling.

"Sod that," he said dispassionately. Lazy lump. It wasn't his fault if she couldn't stay up past her bedtime. If she couldn't handle it, she shouldn't have interfered. "I can't waste anymore time waiting here just watching you drool on the grass with your skirt riding up, purple stripes."

She flushed. "You're such a pervert!" she said, tugging at her hem.

He jumped up into the trees and began leaping from one to another. "Ever considered that I can't do that?" Mikan called out to him.

He paused mid-jump and fell on the grass, raising himself up on scraped elbows and gingerly testing his limbs: nothing sprained, twisted or broken, at least. "Ouch, yeah, I just remembered. Well, you're a bit like a monkey, why don't you try swinging around like the ones in that what-do-you-call-it film?"

"What, Tarzan?"

"Yeah, that one," he said. He saw the expression on her face and finally said, "All right then, just run around on your little bunny legs. You're a fast runner, aren't you?"

"Not bad, but…"

"Good," he said. "Keep up with me." She chased after him, stumbling on rocks and things.

"Why do you have to pretend that I'm not here?" she yelled up at him.

He smiled thinly, keeping his eyes on the trees. "Wishful thinking, that's all. Now be quiet. All that noise that you're making will just give away our position." He forced himself not to look back and refused to jump down and help her. Why should he? He didn't need her anyway.


	6. The Beginning of the End

Chapter Six: The Beginning of the End

The black car drove smoothly by, blending in the night perfectly. Two people sat inside, their hands and feet bound, one girl and one boy. Then an explosion was heard and a circle of people pressed around the car, the smell of smoke filling the air and scorching the night a bright, flaming scarlet.

"Cut Shizuka's ropes!" the boy said urgently. One of the people cut them loose.

Natsume cursed as he sprang down from one of the trees and landed on the hood of the car. He was late, damn it, and he quickly sent fireballs hurtling at their heads. He'd been getting slower, that was for sure, and when he coupled that with having to wait somewhat for Mikan… well, he calculated that they'd lost a good two minutes at the very least.

Persona would have his head, if the Anti-Alices didn't.

"So Persona _did _send him after all," he heard a familiar voice say. Reo Mouri himself had come to the scene and had managed to dodge the flames. Older by five years, it was true—his red hair hung down longer, his face was drawn; he had been hiding from the public eye for five years now—but it was unmistakably him. He was untying the boy as fast as he could. "Go to sleep, Black Cat!" he said loudly, his hand fiddling with his earring.

"No!" Natsume heard from below him, and he saw a quick jet of blue light as Mikan cancelled it out. It was the first time he'd ever seen her Alice take on a corporeal form; it flew towards Reo, knocking him over temporarily.

So he had to acknowledge that she wasn't completely useless—she was keeping some of the other Anti-Alices at bay while he was using his firepower.

"Her…" Reo breathed as Mikan ran over to Natsume. He raised his voice. "Get her! She's worth just as much as the Black Cat. Whoever catches her will be getting a big reward from the bosses."

Mikan felt a bit shaky as she fended off the other Alices who were trying to counterattack Natsume. Unlike earlier practice, these people weren't holding anything back. Natsume penned the girl in a fiery circle, but she simply stood there gazing at Natsume. Then she let out a little laugh.

He whipped his head around. The light from the flames licking at her feet cast her hair in a flaring scarlet-gold halo, and she looked like one of those angels of old, the ones in books that he used to read about when angels were at war with hell. He stared at her dizzily. She looked like an avenging angel, with her hand held out like that, almost cupping the flames within her white palm.

"Get the girl, quick!" she yelled. "Get her, and he'll surrender!"

"No," he said, feeling sick to his stomach. The flames around her rose higher, and her friend tried to get to her, throwing potions at the circle. "Yamazaki!" Shizuka said urgently as nothing worked. "Get out of here!"

"Fall back!" Reo called out. Yamazaki had no choice but to obey Reo's voice pheromone, but he dashed towards Natsume one last time nonetheless. A hand grabbed Mikan around the throat, but Natsume quickly attacked the person, ignoring a splash against his back and the sound of shattering glass. He noticed that at that precise moment, Mikan didn't look too good; she slid to the ground in a faint.

Shizuka was still trapped, but the others were getting away. He looked at the escaping backs of Yamazaki and Reo, and then back at Mikan's unconscious form. Swearing inwardly, he went over to Mikan.

"Hey little girl—hey! Mikan," he said, cradling her limp form. She didn't move, and he felt a chill run down his spine. "Wake up. What's wrong? Did you get hit by something?"

Persona appeared out of the shadows. "Where's the other one?" he said sharply, glancing at Shizuka. She was silent, large violet eyes reflecting the flickering flames that cast orange shadows on her white-blonde hair, which framed her hollow cheekbones lightly. She couldn't have been much older than Natsume and was probably around twenty or so.

"He got away," Natsume said, holding onto Mikan.

"How could you let them escape?" Persona snapped. Natsume said nothing. His mentor looked down at Mikan, then pulled out a small vial from his pocket. "Give her this," he instructed. Natsume blanched as he looked at it.

"There are other ways," he hissed.

He knew the unspeakable pain that the vial could cause. It was like fire eating away at you. He only ever drank it when he had to heal as quickly as possible, and he always regretted having to. Just thinking about it made him feel as though his skin was being torn from him.

"I know that it hurts, but we need her on her feet by tomorrow evening," Persona countered. "Nothing works faster than this, Natsume. What hit her?"

"She… she just fainted from all the excitement," Natsume lied. "She's fine, she just wasn't used to it. I'll take her back to the Academy."

Persona looked straight into the boy's eyes and saw blind defiance. "She makes you weak," he said.

"I don't know what you're—"

"Enough. Take her away. The high school students are going to take over the job that you just bungled up. And if she's not all right by tomorrow, she'll drink it whether you like it or not.""

Natsume said nothing, merely picked Mikan up and started to walk slowly away. He was surprised by how light she was. She let out a shallow breath and he felt his heart stop. At least she was alive.

He felt her stirring as they were just a few feet away from the Academy gates. "Nat… sume…" he heard her whisper hoarsely. "Where…"

"We're at the Academy," he said in a low voice as the guard let them pass through. "Did you get hit by an attack?"

"No, I don't think so," she said. "I just…" She took in a breath sharply. "I don't feel all that good."

"If you throw up on me, I'm going to let you fall on the ground," he said through gritted teeth, shutting out the roaring panic in his ears. "And you're quite heavy, you know. Can you walk?"

"I don't know… let me try," she said. She took a few unsteady steps before letting out a cry as she stumbled. He caught her quickly, turning swiftly so that as she fell he cushioned her. "Oh my god. Are you okay?"

"Sure, don't worry," he said, wincing. "I very cleverly used my spine to break our fall."

"I don't know what's wrong with me," she whispered.

"You were probably just hit by someone's Alice, that's all," he said, carrying her in his arms again. Then her forehead brushed against his cheek and he stopped in his tracks. She was burning up.

"Are you sick?" he asked.

She didn't answer, instead one hand clutched at his shoulder. "Natsume, don't breathe a word to anyone about this," she pleaded. "Don't tell Hotaru or Ruka. I don't want them to worry about me. Does… does Persona know?"

"I told him that you just got overexcited," he said. "I won't let anyone know." He realized uncomfortably that he didn't know where her dorm was. "Hey… where do you stay?"

He opened the door she'd pointed at. He hadn't realized one-star rooms were so small. And cold. He hated to think of what it must have been like when she was a no-star.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Hotaru?" he said, nearly dropping Mikan when he saw the black-haired figure sitting on Mikan's bed. The girl immediately pulled out a camera and began snapping pictures of them.

Natsume glared and tried to set her camera on fire, but nothing happened. "Mikan nullified it for me this afternoon," she said with a smirk. "For practice."

"What're you doing here?" he said angrily.

"Why don't you put her down?" Hotaru suggested in her silkiest manner. "I'm her best friend. I was going to ask her for the money she owed me and figured she was just hiding from me. I never expected to see… this."

"I don't like that insinuation," Natsume said angrily. "I just found polka-dots in the Northern Forest, and that stupid giant chick was attacking her." Hotaru moved towards her, but Natsume pulled Mikan away. He'd promised Mikan that he wouldn't let them know. If Hotaru felt her forehead, she'd definitely realize that something was wrong.

"Get out," Natsume said, kicking open the door with difficulty and jerking his head towards it. "Don't touch her." Hotaru's purple eyes flashed briefly before she left.


	7. Losses

Chapter Seven: Losses

"I managed to get him," Yamazaki said in a low voice. They sat in a small circle around a table in the Anti-Alice organization headquarters. "Hit him with a Loss Potion. But we weren't banking on him having a partner with him, were we?"

Reo shrugged. "Well, we couldn't expect everything to go exactly according to plan," he allowed. "Shizuka's in the Academy. _He'll _be having a nasty surprise when he sees her again."

"What did the bosses say?" the younger boy asked, running a hand through his short blue hair.

"Oh, you know them," Reo said nonchalantly. "But they _did _give the go signal for the plan, so we've got that much at least. The higher-ups are organizing their own stuff, so it's pretty touch and go for now. Of course," he added with a smirk, "they'll be listening to us if this thing works."

"It will," Yamazaki assured him. "This thing's in the bag. Shizuka can't fail. He won't be too happy to see her."

"Understatement of the year," Reo agreed. "I only wish I could see his face when he realizes exactly who the Black Cat got this time. It's beautiful, isn't it? But that's just a bonus. You _know _that Natsume Hyuuga's our real target. Saiko?"

A girl on his right side nodded. "Of course. He's the only missing link." She was fifteen and might have been a student at the Academy, if they'd known that she existed. As thorough as the Academy was, the Anti-Alices managed to keep certain Alices hidden away from them. "The rest of us are assembled. But without him, it's useless to even try."

"Earth, Air, Fire, Water," another boy said dryly, around the first girl's age. He had an obnoxious air that the others seemed to accept—or at least, have resigned themselves to. "I wish the higher-ups would give me permission to carry through _my _plan. I could shake things up a little for Hyuuga Natsume."

Reo smiled indulgently—it was plain that he favored the boy. "Of course you would, Kazuo. But like I said, they're busy with their own agenda. I must admit though, you're plan would be really effective."

"My time will come," he said impassively.

"Natsume Hyuuga's time has already come," Yamazaki said, smirking. "Where is he now, Midori?"

From behind a crystal ball peered one green eye. "He's at the girl's room," she said. "So this is the Loss Potion?"

"Yes," Yamazaki said. "And there's no existing antidote."

Mikan felt as though she was floating. She was blissfully unaware of the exchange between Natsume and Hotaru. She had been vaguely aware of two tones making sounds, but she couldn't understand any of it. "Hey," she heard a distant voice. "Mikan. Are you all right?"

"Ruka?" she found herself whispering stupidly. She blinked with unfocused eyes, her head pounding. "I…"

"It's me, little girl. Natsume," the voice said, sounding bitter. "Ruka's probably asleep by now. I took you to your dorm."

"Thanks," she said, realizing that she was lying on her bed with the covers tucked around her. "I'll be okay."

"No, you won't be," he said. "You're burning up. You won't be fine by yourself. I should take you to the hospital—"

"Don't," she said weakly. He didn't argue, seeing as he already had a horrendously vivid mental image of what would happen to her if he tried checking her in somewhere. She wouldn't be taken to the hospital. Persona would just give her those horrible drugs of his. He could imagine her screaming into her pillow already. He smoothed her hair off her forehead unhappily.

"I won't," he agreed. A cold draft came through the windows, and he noticed her shiver even underneath all the blankets. "Listen, I could tell a teacher." He doubted his own words. He hated the teachers, and the feeling was definitely mutual. They would just ask Persona what they were supposed to do. "Or not."

"Natsume, I don't know what's happening," she said, her face the color of blood on snow. "I'm scared. I don't want to die yet… and I don't want to die alone."

He felt a sharp pang of regret. It was his fault that she had been there tonight. If it wasn't for him, Persona wouldn't have brought her into the undercover agents… "You won't die," he told her.

"Everyone has to die sometime, Natsume."

"Only the beautiful die young," he said lightly. "So don't worry, it looks like you're going to live to be older and even uglier than you are now, because you definitely don't fit into that category."

She laughed. "Thanks," she said sleepily. "Are you going back to your dorm?"

He fell silent. "I can't leave you here alone," he said at last. But she had already dozed off. With a resigned sigh, he sank down on the floor, his tired eyes watching her in the darkness.

Ruka was in fact, not yet asleep. He'd been tossing and turning all night but couldn't relax at all.

"So you _are _awake," he heard from his open window. Hotaru hovered there on her floating duck thingy, looking half-comical and half-eerie in the pale moonlight. "I thought you might be."

"Can't you just say hi like any normal person?" he complained as he motioned for her to come in, which she did. She took off her helmet and turned her unblinking purple gaze on him.

"Do you know where Natsume is tonight?" she asked him matter-of-factly.

"I—of course I do," he said, caught off guard. "He's at his room. He told me that he had a job tonight, but other than that, he'd be back by morning at the very latest. Any particular reason for asking?"

She gave him a thin-lipped smile. "He carried Mikan to her room. I waited for half an hour but he still isn't out."

Before he could let out the string of profanities that had first come to his mind, she clamped a hand over his mouth. After a while she released him. "Don't scream," she warned him. He nodded, and she flopped down on his bed without invitation. "Good to see that you're taking this well."

He stood up. "Ruka, where're you going?" she said in alarm. He ignored her, slamming the door behind him as he made his way over to Mikan's apartment. He knew it well enough, seeing as Mikan had him and Hotaru and Yuu over sometimes for tea and other things like that.

As far as he could remember, she always invited Natsume too but he would always say that he was too busy to bother with little girls and their tea parties with dolls, quite ignoring the fact that she was fifteen—hardly a little girl anymore—and certainly didn't play with _dolls_.

Hotaru had to be lying. He knocked on Mikan's door. No answer. He knocked again, more forcefully this time. After pounding on it for about five minutes (thankfully none of the other residents of that floor woke up) the door opened, and he found himself face-to-face with his best friend.

"Ruka…" Natsume said, his exhausted eyes barely registering the blonde boy's face in front of him.

"I… uh…" Ruka looked past Natsume and saw Mikan sleeping peacefully in her bed. He looked away. "What're you doing here?"

Natsume frowned. "Hotaru told you that I'd be here, right?" he said with a yawn, running a hand through his messy black hair. He looked terrible; his clothes were rumpled, and his mouth was a thin, hard line on his face. His eyes had a mother-of-pearl shine underneath them that Ruka might have taken for tears if he hadn't known that Natsume never cried. Ever. They looked as though he'd been rubbing them viciously in an effort to stay awake. "Whatever. What do you need?"

"I… just wanted to say hi," Ruka lied stupidly.

A flicker of impatience showed in Natsume's eyes. "Hi. Bye. Now go away."

Ruka couldn't stand it anymore. "What're you doing in Mikan's room?"

Natsume dropped his gaze to the floor. "It's nothing," he said flatly. "Leave it alone, Ruka, will you? I'll… there are a couple of things that I just can't explain to you. And… and I'm busy."

"Too busy to see your own best friend?" Ruka knew that he was being incredibly illogical, but he couldn't help himself. It had to happen sometime… Mikan and Natsume were bound to fall for each other while he just stood by the sidelines watching them. But he wanted to hear it from Natsume's mouth first.

"Well… technically I _am _seeing you. You know, I'm using my eyes and everything—"

"It's not funny, Natsume. Why do you have to turn everything into some big joke?" The smirk dropped off his best friend's face as though it had been cut away, but Ruka didn't look at him.


	8. Whispers of Revelation

Chapter Eight: Whispers of Revelation

He had no idea exactly when he'd fallen asleep. All he knew was that he woke up feeling as though he hadn't closed his eyes at all. And he groggily realized that he could hear the shower in the background. Then he looked up at the bed—empty.

Grimly he pushed himself up, rubbing at his bloodshot eyes. Damn her, she was planning on leaving him there. She emerged, fully dressed in her Academy uniform and her wet hair clinging to her face. Her face was pale and her cheeks were still flushed with the fever and she tip-toed unsteadily to the door, clearly intending to sneak out but wobbling slightly as she took each step.

"Where do you think you're going?"

She winced as she turned around to face him. "Natsume! I, um, meant to wake you up, but you were sleeping so peacefully, and I felt so guilty about making you stay up half the night just because of me—"

"You're not going to class."

It was a statement, not a question, and she raised an eyebrow. "I don't see why not," she said tartly. "Hotaru and Ruka—"

"I spent half the night not only staying up babysitting you, I had to fend those two off," he said, suddenly looking very tired and old. "Now Ruka hates me, and I'm on Hotaru's black list, and did I mention that she has some extremely compromising pictures from last night?"

Mikan dropped her school bag. "What do you mean, compromising pictures?"

He rolled his eyes. "Ask her. _You're_ her best friend."

"Fine, I will," she said with a toss of her head. Faster than she'd ever seen him move, he darted past her and shoved an arm in her way. He was white with rage and exhaustion, and his red eyes stuck out like burning lamps on his face.

"You sodding idiot," he said calmly, his voice completely even. "The whole evening, I had to look after you and listen to your whining and then shove out my one and only friend and lie to Persona just because of you. I had to let that other Anti-Alice go because of you. I don't know what the hell you're trying to achieve here, but you'd better stop jerking me around because I'm sick of it."

For a moment they stood there just staring at each other. "There's no reason for me to miss classes," she said.

"Yeah, because aside from the fact that you can barely stand, you're basically fine," he said sarcastically. "You're not thinking straight. And if you don't come to your senses in five seconds, I'm going to use my Alice on you."

She tossed her head. "I'm fine." She was leaning casually against the wall, for once looking strangely elegant and poised.

"That wall's all that's holding you up, isn't it?"

"No, it isn't."

He folded his arms across his chest. "Prove it, then."

She hesitated before walking slowly and deliberately over to him. "There, you see?" she said, and for a split second he thought that she was right—until she collapsed. He swore as he caught her, thanking God for the first time in his entire life that Persona had taught him to be fast.

"Maybe next time you'll listen to me," he said angrily into her ear, falling to his knees. His breath was cold on her skin, and she shivered.

"They skipped all of their classes so far today," Narumi told Persona. He didn't like the man, honestly, but he had to report to him. Persona was pretty much untouchable. In cases like this—in fact, in any case where he was involved—it was best to just tell him what he wanted and then hope that he moved on to someone or something else. "Not just mine, and it's already ten o'clock. Bit unusual, isn't it? Natsume's pretty much that kind of kid, but Mikan…"

"She's a good kid," Persona said, his voice dripping sarcasm. He rarely ever put in an appearance at the faculty room, but he wanted to check up on Natsume and Mikan after last night's events. "I see."

"It was a mistake to let her into the Academy," Mr. Jinno snorted. "She's a bad influence on our best students. Hotaru Imaii, Yuu Tobita and Natsume Hyuuga all suffer from her presence."

Narumi frowned. "She's an Alice. There's no arguing with that."

Persona seemed completely uninterested in their little debate. "I know where he is, don't worry," he said calmly. He glanced at the student who had been standing silently by his side—another one of his 'masterpieces', although no one came near to Natsume. "Let's go."

They stopped in front of a white-painted door with a painting of a flower hanging on the front of it. _Childish._ He curled his lip in disgust and opened the door.

The room was bathed in sunlight, and Persona's eyes immediately fell on the bed where Natsume had fallen asleep, Mikan clutching tightly at his sleeve. Even when she'd fainted, she'd refused to let go of him. He hadn't exactly had much of a choice—but of course Persona didn't know that.

But what made Persona's eyes darken was the tranquil expression on Natsume's face. He'd watched the boy sleep before, in the rare moments that Natsume snatched in between missions. Natsume would toss and turn and always seemed to be in pain—not that that wasn't understandable, seeing as he had to take pills on a daily basis. But all the sunlight revealed on his face was peace. He couldn't bring himself to touch the boy.

"Chiaki, wake him up."

The student shook Natsume. Immediately the boy sat up, but had to sink back to his elbows when he realized that he'd wake up Mikan if he moved any more. He glanced at the hand clutching him with exasperation. "Fancy meeting you here," he said flippantly, squinting at Persona.

"Get up. I'm going to give you training today," Persona said dangerously. "Leave your pet girl."

Natsume swallowed hard. "It's… not…"

"Don't make me tell you more than once. Hurry up. You've already cut most of your classes anyway," Persona said. "Chiaki's going to watch over your little pet. Are you sure she wasn't hit by an attack?"

"No," he said. That was pretty much true; he'd been watching her the whole time, out of the corner of his eye. There was that creep who'd tried to strangle her, but that had only lasted for a second. "She wasn't." He used his Alice to burn away the part of his shirt she'd been holding on to, singeing his arm.

"If she isn't all right by this afternoon, I'll give her the pills," Persona said. "Come on, then."

The cries emanating from the room beside the one she was being kept in made Shizuka bite her lip. She'd heard Persona yell the name Natsume at one point and something to the effect that he hadn't been training properly, that he wasn't focusing on the task at hand, and other such things.

And she'd heard the sickening crack of a whip. The first few times, there had only been silence. But then she knew he couldn't stand it anymore, and then the muffled howls pierced through the walls. She knew that whip. God, she knew it well.

She heard Persona's footsteps echoing through the corridors as he left. One kind of footstep, she decided, and made a split decision to risk whether the boy had a guard or not. She slid a loose stone out of place. "Hello?"

Natsume's back was a mess of scars and blood. He turned around, snatching at his white shirt. "You're the girl we got last night."

"Right. I'm Shizuka," she said. She poked a hand through the small opening, but recoiled when he sent a flame jetting towards her.

"Don't even think of escaping," he said matter-of-factly. "You can't run away."

"I did, once," she said. "I used to be a student here at the Academy."

He gingerly took a seat in front of Persona's desk. "I've heard this type of story before," he said. "Like Reo's. The whole boo-hoo-I-was-used-by-the-Academy crap. No points for originality for you. You guys all say the same thing."

"Reo's story? That's pathetic. What would Reo have known? Persona never threatened the people who were precious to him. He never had to deal with that. He had it lucky—he didn't go through the things the rest of us did. I don't' blame you for not listening to him."

She knew she'd hit a nerve when he drew in a sharp breath. "And when you ran away, it didn't do them much good, did it? No, you left them to face Persona. That was pretty selfish of you."

"I ran away because he whipped a friend of mine," she said dully. "You see, there were two people who meant the entire world to me: my cousin, and my best friend. He used the same whip that he used on you. He made me watch. Then he threw me in this very same cell. My cousin watched me and didn't do a thing. So my friend and I both left the Academy that same night."

"I couldn't leave even if I wanted to," Natsume said, unable to mask the hungry look in his eye.

"But you could," Shizuka said. "_We_ did."

"How…?" He stopped himself, trying to shake his head to clear it, but it was obvious that he was starting to wonder if he could somehow escape himself. And maybe Ruka along with him.

"It was simple. There was an old route that most people didn't know about. We discovered it when we were wandering about. I'm a Telepath, you see. That means more than just a mind-reader. That's a wholly different Alice all together. My Alice enables me to do so much more. I found the path. We left by using it. We'd had enough of the drugs and the beating and being unable to talk." She sighed. "I guess I should be leaving in a while."

Natsume looked sharply at her through the hole. "What do you mean _leave?_"

"It'll take more than a simple lock to hold me," she said quietly. "If I wanted to, I could kill you. But what's the point? You're as much a victim as I am."


	9. Catalysts and Changes

Chapter Nine: Catalysts and Changes

Narumi ran down the corridor. He'd heard Chiaki speaking softly to another one of the elite operations team members about a job that Natsume had botched last night—the first time he'd slipped up, ever. No wonder Persona had been so pissed off that morning... well, more than usual, anyway.

He'd also heard about the person who'd gotten away. Yamazaki Shinichi—the boy had been a student during his time, albeit one several years younger. He raced past people. It was the other one who worried him. _Shizuka_.

He knew the way into the secret passage anyway, where she was being held. Persona hadn't mentioned it at all. Of course he didn't; Persona must have kept silent because he knew exactly how it would affect him.

He removed his shoes and tip-toed down the corridor where he knew Persona kept all his prisoners. He heard voices.

"I'm not a victim," he heard Natsume's wintry voice from one door. The boy sounded as though he didn't believe his own words. And he didn't, for that matter.

He was trying his hardest to remind himself that she was one of the Anti-Alice organization and besides that, a Telepath—it was a struggle, and she didn't have to even look at him to read everything that went on in his mind. She was exploiting all his weaknesses.

But the truth was much different. She barely even needed her powers to know exactly which buttons to push. She'd been _there, _for God's sake. _I can read you like the back of my hand… Even Reo knew what goes on in your head—all of us, we know. We were used._

"Don't pretend that you're me because you don't know how I feel," he seethed. That was even harder for him to believe, since she had summed up everything he'd been thinking perfectly. If anyone understood, it was her and the rest of the Anti-Alice group.

Shizuka's once-bubbly laughter was dry. "I'm not going to pretend that I'm you or anything like that. Maybe your circumstances are different. Surely Persona never threatened one of your friends? He's never made you wear a Control Mask that sent shocks down your spine? Who the hell knows, maybe the Academy _is _changing after all these years."

Narumi and Natsume both flinched. Shizuka smiled secretly, knowing that Narumi was there, listening in on them. She hadn't been lying when she'd told Natsume that her Telepathic powers meant more than just mind-reading—there he was, with the impudence to come here, in this place of all places, after so long. God, how she hated him.

"It's different for you," she continued loudly, knowing that her voice was like a serrated dagger twisting in Narumi's chest. "You have friends who stick up for you. What did I have but a cousin who let me suffer without making a single move to stop Persona? What did he care about what happened to me? Everyone who mattered to me was either brainwashed or beaten up."

"Shizuka—"

Narumi clamped a hand over his mouth, but the damage was done. She didn't bother turning around, keeping her eyes focused on Natsume. "Hello, cousin," she said coldly.

Ruka crouched beside Hotaru near Mikan's door. "I really don't see the point in this," he said, exasperated. "We're going to have classes in a while anyway; lunchtime will be over in a bit and a half. Why don't we just go back already?"

She raised an eyebrow but not her head, which was kept industriously bent over a screw that she was tightening. "Ruka, I want you to look me straight in the eye and tell me that you don't want to know what Natsume and Mikan are up to and have been up to ever since last night. Go ahead. Convince me, rabbit boy."

He paused, but surrendered after a moment. "Okay, fine, so Iwant to know," he muttered, scowling at her. She was so bloody _superior._ "But only because I'm worried that something's wrong."

Mercifully, she didn't challenge his statements although her brows were now raised so high that they were in danger of disappearing into her hairline. "Good. Then you'll stop whining on and on about it and help me," she said, tweaking a wire on her fly-on-the-wall camera invention. She fed it underneath the door frame and waited until it had flown up on one of the walls of the room. "I'm in."

She held up a small monitor, much like the one she had used more than five years ago when Mikan had tried to run away from the Academy and Ruka had helped her. The screen showed one figure, sleeping on the bed. "Mikan," Hotaru said dismissively. The brown hair was unmistakable. "No sign of Natsume, though."

"What?" Ruka said, dumbfounded. A mission, he assured himself. That was probably it—it all pretty much fell into place. Persona _had _recruited Mikan. They were likely put together on an assignment. "Oh God. I'm an idiot."

Hotaru rolled her eyes. "Hallelujah. When did this epiphany suddenly come over you?" He ignored her and explained quickly. "Well, I kind of thought that that was obvious," she answered.

"You mean you _knew?_ Why the hell didn't you—oh, for the love of—"

She waited until he was done. "Tell me, what _is _it about hanging out with Natsume that gives people such colorful vocabularies?" she asked rhetorically. "Yes, Ruka, I _knew _that. I thought you did too, since anyone with half a mind can see that. What I wanted to know was the real reason why Natsume was going around heaving her around the place like they were newlyweds."

Then a mouse suddenly dashed in front of them—a warning sign that Ruka evidently recognized. "Someone's coming," Ruka said in a low voice, starting to scramble to his feet. "Come on, let's hide, quick—"

Hotaru grabbed his arm and ran down with him to the room beside Mikan's, which opened immediately—doors were hardly ever kept locked at the Academy. "We're trespassing," Ruka said, looking fearfully at the mass of underwear some enterprising female Alice had decided to leave on her bed.

"We're also eavesdropping. We might as well be hanged for a dragon as for an egg, don't you think?" she said, perching herself on the bed's edge. "A Double D cup—whoever stays in here sure gets around," she added unkindly. She gestured for Ruka to sit beside her so that he could see the screen too, and he did so with apprehension.

"Hello, Narumi. It's been quite a while," Shizuka said, peering at him through the bars. Natsume wanted to kick himself. Why hadn't he made the connection? They had the same white-blonde hair, violet eyes, even had the same annoying smile, from what he could see of it through the small space in the wall.

"Give it up, Shizuka," the teacher said tonelessly. "I had a feeling that you were trying to get to Natsume."

Natsume stiffened. She let out a wry laugh. "Come on, you know me better than that," she said. "Why would I send myself back here? Back to this miserable place which I never wanted to see again?"

"It's for the Anti-Alice organization, isn't it?" Narumi said sadly. "They let you be captured on purpose."

Her tone remained perfectly even. "Yamazaki would _never _have left me behind," she said. "No matter what they'd say. Remember? We all made a pact back when we were at the Academy, you and me and Yamazaki and Reo and that person. Good times, huh?"

She flashed him a brilliant smile. He remembered, all right. It had been her birthday and they—partly drunk; it had to be conceded—suddenly decided to promise to stand together no matter what. It was incredibly cheesy, but they were slightly sobered up by the fact that that day, Persona had recruited her for the special operations team. Yamazaki had been put in too, since they never went anywhere without each other anyway.

Narumi was unable to hide the catch in his voice as he said, "You were always a good actress. You'd do anything for whatever you cared most about—"

"—which is more than I can say for _some _people," she cut in coolly. He flinched, and she could sense it even though her back was turned. "Why'd you even bother coming down here? Feeling a little nostalgic? The same old scene, me behind bars and someone getting whipped in the room beside it. Amazing how history seems to repeat itself, don't you think?"

"Shizuka—"

"_Narumi,_" she mimicked, bored. "Look, you know what you should do? Go up to the Academy. I may be trapped inside here, but there's no control item you could possibly make to try to suppress my Alice. Trust me, Persona's tried. Locking me here's the best he can do. I can use my powers however I like. I could get out of here if I wanted to." Narumi tensed, wondering whether she would make good on her threat.

She shrugged. "But there're more important things going on right now." Her lips pursed, and she seemed to be caught in a sort of momentary trance.

"Typical," she said when she came back to reality. "How crude of him. Manipulating people by using the ones closest to them." She let out a wry laugh that made Narumi avert his face. He remembered a time when that laughter had echoed down the Academy's halls while they raced up and down, giggling madly when they hid from some approaching teacher and laughing even harder when they got caught. "Persona made it an art, torturing people through the ones they loved the most. He always knew what we wanted, even if we didn't know it ourselves."

"What're you driving at, then?" Natsume heard himself say.

She turned her eyes on him unblinkingly. "Persona, of course. I've been monitoring his movements ever since he left. He's going to your partner's room. You know—Sakura Mikan?"


	10. Blind Escape

Chapter Ten: Blind Escape

"Stop fidgeting, Ruka," Hotaru ordered, poking him. "Don't think there won't be repercussions if you don't stop." He shifted uncomfortably around on the bed, and she threw a camisole at him, a scrap of peach-pink lace and silk. He ducked it and sat stone-still when she gingerly lifted up a thong and waved it warningly at him.

Persona—now out of his disguise—shook Mikan awake. Behind him stood that Chiaki student, the one from the high school. Ruka leaned in close to the monitor and speakers, determined not to miss a single word or gesture. He wasn't disappointed.

Mikan mumbled in her sleep. "Nat—"

Lip curling, Persona lifted her up by the collar of her shirt. Her eyes flew open in surprise.

"Dreaming about my little protégé?" he sneered, barely controlling his loathing. It was _this _girl, the one Natsume had made into his little pet kitten. She had a different aura. But that didn't mean that she could just come along and ruin the Academy's finest undercover agent. He glanced at the student behind him. "Chiaki, what time is it?"

"It's exactly twelve o'clock."

He bared his teeth in a wintry smile. "Good. That's technically afternoon." He put his hand on Mikan's forehead and drew it back hastily as though he'd just been burned. "I thought Natsume said that you weren't sick."

"I'm… not…" she protested. Now that the initial shock of Persona practically wringing her by the neck to wake her up was over, she was starting to feel terrible. All she wanted to do was get back to sleep.

Persona tapped his chin with a finger. "I see. And the fever?"

She avoided his piercing gaze. "Just the heat. Hot in here, isn't it?"

He raised an eyebrow behind the mask. "You _do _realize that it's the beginning of November, don't you?" He wasn't wrong; a cold breeze was blowing in from her open window, and it looked as though it was going to snow later that night, despite the prickly heat that climbed up and down her body.

She was starting to feel cold all over, but the freezing hand that he put to her cheek made Persona tsk-tsk about how sick she was. He had a bizarrely paternal smile on his face—she could only assume that it didn't bode well.

"Here," he said, handing her a bottle of pills. "Take two of those. You'll feel much better afterwards."

She eyed them warily. "Are these things okay?" At his incredulous look, she added, "I just, you know… don't want to…"

"Come with me," he said, gripping her tightly by the arm. Ruka and Hotaru followed at a discreet distance.

The thick wooden door was locked—something most Alices almost never did unless they were engaged in something private, like dressing up and so on. But it seemed as though there was no one inside. Persona smirked and touched a long fingernail to the keyhole; it opened easily. "That's Natsume's room," Ruka said, astonished, as they went inside

"This is Natsume's room."

Mikan looked around her. The room was neat and expensively furnished. _So this is how a special-class student lives, _she thought, dazed by both Persona's strange attitude and her splitting headache. "Why'd you bring me here?"

Persona pointed at a row of bottles, each one containing a different type of pill—some were full of liquids bubbling sluggishly, and others had huge tablets the size of her pinkie. "See those?" he asked casually. She nodded. "Those are the pills he has to take every day."

She stared at the large array. "All these…?"

He smiled. "What did you think? Twice a day, everyday. Sometimes more. Hasn't he told you?"

When she shook her head, he let out a laugh. "I didn't think he would have," he said. "He forgot to take his medicine last night after his mission. He should be feeling the effects in awhile. Do you realize why he forgot?"

Again the shake of the head, again the laugh. "That's because he was busy convincing me that you were fine and didn't need to take your _own _medicine. Drink them down."

Her eyes swept across the row of bottles with a little shudder. Reaching out, she took the container from Persona and drank two of them down. That was all she was able to do before she let out a gasp and the bottle fell to the floor. She covered her mouth with her hand.

"What's going on?" Ruka whispered softly to Hotaru, leaning close to the monitor. Both of them were crouched just outside the door, watching what was going on with Hotaru's camera. He saw Mikan fall down as though in a faint, her fingers twitching. "Those things aren't _poison, _are they?"

"Of course not," she said. "She's one of the undercover agents, there's no reason for him to do that. That would be a waste of a valuable tool. And besides, he knows that he'd have to deal with—"

She broke off as Natsume charged past them, not even bothering to stop and ask them why they were posted right outside his bedroom door. "Persona!" they heard him yell through the heavy oak. Hotaru winced as his shout was echoed through the speakers.

"I thought I told you to stay put at headquarters," Persona said dangerously. He gestured at Chiaki, and the student threw his hands up.

"A barrier?" Natsume sneered. "How quaint. That's not enough to hold _me _back." He conjured a blue flame in the palm of his hand. It clearly took him a lot of effort, and he winced at the barrier's rebound. But he held his ground.

"You're in no condition to fight," Persona said. "Not even counting the marks on your back, there's still the fact that you forgot to take your pills and you're still fresh out of an assignment. It isn't worth it."

Natsume looked down at Mikan's inert form. There was a look on it—one that Ruka knew well. It was the sort of pained, dull expression that often filled his best friend's eyes. "It's worth it," he breathed.

"Is _she _worth it?" Persona asked.

His pupil was silent for a moment. "It's worth it just to put an end to all this."

And with that, the room erupted in flames.

"Mikan? Mikan!"

She heard voices around her. She felt as though she was being strangled, and a prickly heat was all over her. It was nothing compared to what she first felt when she'd had downed the pills, though. She'd been sure that she was going to die.

"She has to be okay," she heard a distinctly male voice. "She just _has _to be."

Her eyes opened. "R… Ruka?" she stammered. "Hotaru?"

They were bent over her. Hotaru's blank face flickered for a moment, giving way to relief, but then she went back to indifference. "Are you okay?" Ruka asked. He had a scratch down the side of his face, and his arm had an angry burn mark on it.

"Yeah, thanks," she said shakily. "What happened?"

"Natsume," Hotaru said shortly. She had a thin wound on her left cheek too, and there was the unmistakable smell of scorched skin around her, although she didn't say anything. Mikan noticed that the sleeve of her shirt was dark with blood. "His room's a mess. He burned everything up in it."

"He _what_?" she said, horrified. "Natsume—where is he?"

Ruka looked away. "He's gone," he said hopelessly, trying to keep his tone perfectly even. "After the explosion, he just… vanished." His fingers balled up into fists. "I don't know where he could have gone."

"What happened to Persona, then?"

Hotaru's mouth twisted up into an ironic smile. "He's just fine. That Chiaki student concentrated all her powers on him and defended him at the right moment. Of course, she's in the hospital right now. She got the worst of it all. We were okay, seeing as we were outside during the time, but we still got a little of it."

"Then… why wasn't I…?"

"Maybe it was your Alice," Ruka said. "Or Natsume could have manipulated his powers so that it wouldn't touch you. That's possible too."

Her eyes filled up with tears. "Don't start crying now!" Ruka said in alarm. "What's the matter? I'm sure Natsume's all right—"

"No, he isn't," she said, looking blindly around her. She realized that they were still in his room, Persona and Chiaki now absent. It was filled with the smell of smoke and burnt cloth. She saw the shelf where the bottles had been neatly stored before, now smashed. She saw pools of noxious-smelling liquid and charred bits of pills on the floor.


	11. Forever Isn't Long Enough

Chapter Eleven: Forever isn't Long Enough

"Let's go," Natsume said when he reappeared beside Shizuka back down at the underground headquarters. Narumi was stuffed inside her cell, bound and gagged, purple eyes looking wildly at Natsume as though asking him to think twice about what he was doing. The boy looked in no condition to leave; his face was bloody, and he was speaking only with great effort. Using all that power exhausted him—especially after suffering from the rebound of Chiaki's barrier. Chiaki was, after all, a prodigious barrier manipulator.

Shizuka looked unrepentantly at her cousin.

"It isn't nice to be in there, is it?" she asked him softly. "And I was there for a whole week until I managed to hone my powers to a point where I could escape. I'm afraid that you won't get your just punishment, but this is a little measure of what it was like."

He looked at her, his gaze pleading. "No, I am _not,_" she said, her voice growing heated and impatient. "I suppose that's what you tell yourself at night so that you don't have to face the guilt. But I _chose _to join the Anti-Alice organization. I had a lot of other alternatives, Narumi, but I never gave them a second thought because I had to fight the good fight."

Angry tears gathered at the corners of her eyes. _Oh Narumi I wish I could tell you that I loved you once… you're my cousin, after all, and blood is not water. _

She held her hand out to Natsume, noticing that the boy was swaying unsteadily on his feet. "We have to go."

"Ruka… and the others…" he muttered to himself, running a hand through his hair. "You promise me that you really can take care of Persona if he does anything to them?"

"Yes," she answered. "My Alice could reach here if I made a real effort." She glanced at Narumi. "Oh well, I can always erase that information from his memory if I want to. I'll be able to tell whether he's torturing them or not, or something like that. I could use my Alice to help them—to a certain extent."

"All right," he said. "And you swear to God that we can contact them?"

"Yes," she said again. "But as I said, we have to leave _now, _Natsume. I already contacted the organization, and Seishiro is right in the next room waiting to bring us to headquarters."

She blew a kiss to Narumi. "I'll be waiting for the day we can send our regards to the Academy," she said sweetly. "Even if _you've _broken the pact, the rest of us are keeping it alive."

_Shizuka, listen to me, do what you like, but don't interfere with my students! _He thought furiously at her. _I'm sorry for what happened when we were students, but—_

_Enough, _he heard her voice in his mind, her luminous eyes staring at him. _I'll never ever forgive you._

_But forever is too long a time for any of us, _he thought with a wan smile.

_Not for me, cousin. Not for me._

It was a sorry sight that greeted Persona down at headquarters. He was sure that Natsume would still be there or something like that, and he'd been keen to vent some of his fury on the boy. Landing Hatori Chiaki in the hospital—what was he thinking, hurting one of the undercover agents?

But all he saw was Narumi, bound in Shizuka's cell, which only served to double his fuming. "Oh great," he muttered under his breath as he pointed a finger at Narumi's ropes, which fell apart immediately. "Budge up, Narumi, you soft-hearted lump. How did you find on that Nagasaki Shizuka was being held in here?"

Narumi pulled off his gag and gingerly felt his chafed wrists. He was a little shaken, but none the worse for the wear. "I… overheard about it," he said evasively. "Around. Here and there. She… she, ah, contacted me telepathically…" His face flushed a violent scarlet. He knew that Persona knew that Shizuka would never have sent him a message. Never.

"Chiaki has a big mouth."

Paling, Narumi said quickly, "It has nothing to do with her—"

"She's a terrible gossip," Persona continued frankly. "You know how it is—pretty teenage girl, brimming with lots and lots of those hormones seething in her blood, well; she has to find an outlet somehow. I'm sure the news has circulated to all the undercover agents already."

His face changed, contorting slightly. "They felt no love for Natsume, as I'm sure you well know—they were aware that he was my favorite, besides being the youngest ever to join the ranks and having limitless powers."

"You had no right to be down here, Narumi," he said, tone cold. "I didn't tell you because I knew quite well that you would do something stupid. And I was right, wasn't I?" His eyes swept the room.

"So she's escaped… and to think I'd planned to use Natsume as a guard. I didn't think that she could have affected him so readily. She might not have, if you hadn't come along, Narumi. She brought Natsume with her, didn't she?"

At Narumi's nod, Persona started back up the stairs. "Where're you going?" Narumi called out after him.

"Now that Natsume's part of the Anti-Alice organization, I have to set some students to recapture him. Hopefully bring him back to the Academy. If not, they're going to have to eliminate him."

"Eliminate him?" Narumi spluttered in disbelief. "That's too much! How could you just say that when he's your…" The word _slave _flashed briefly in his mind before he diplomatically said, "protégé?"

"But of course," the other man said coolly. "That's exactly why he has to be stopped—I trained him to a point where his skills are beyond almost any of the students here. What did you expect? Natsume's quite dangerous. Now that he's fallen into enemy hands, we have to make sure that he doesn't use his powers on their behalf. Even if he was alone, he could take down all the students in this Academy. And he won't be alone, Narumi, you can be sure of that. He'll be corrupted by the other Anti-Alices. Then he could destroy the world."

"But he wouldn't hurt his friends—!"

To his surprise, Persona smirked. "I know," he said. "That's what I'm counting on."

"So this is the infamous Black Cat."

Natsume looked resentfully back at the circle of people goggling at him. He wished they wouldn't goggle at him like that, like he was an animal in a zoo cage, and clearly Shizuka was still reading his mind, because she looked meaningfully at the rest of them—most likely passing along a telepathic message, he supposed. They dropped their gazes immediately.

"Reo," he said in disgust, wrinkling his nose when he recognized the singer sitting in the middle of them all. Reo inclined his head slightly, but backed off.

"You don't look too well," a girl with long brown hair said, words tumbling out of her mouth. Then she blushed. "Sorry, that isn't my business."

"He's injured," Shizuka said. "Blew up his room, from what I saw, anyway. Too bad you weren't able to get Persona straight on," she added regretfully to Natsume. "That Chiaki person shielded him."

He snorted. "She was always a bit of a loyalist idiot anyway," he said darkly.

A sleekly-coiffed boy with an arrogant air regarded him with frank disdain. "We should get him cleaned up a bit. Saiko's right. I mean, we can't have him bleeding all over the floors, can we?"

"That's enough, Kazuo!" the girl with brown hair—presumably the one called Saiko, said warningly, glaring at the other boy. "He was hurt fighting the good fight." The words didn't seem quite so trite and stupid when she said it; she had an air of absolute faith in the resistance movement that made Natsume wince slightly. She turned her smoky-hollowed eyes back to Natsume. "I can take you to a spare room, if you like."

"It wouldn't do for your friends to see you in this state when you contact them," Shizuka added. Natsume shrugged and followed after the girl.

"How long have you been here?" he asked her, words echoing on the walls.

She glanced back at him as they navigated through a series of corridors. "As long as I can remember," she answered. "I don't know what happened to my parents, but Reo told me that they were Alices too. I dunno, maybe they're still alive out there, possibly in a branch of the organization. At least, I hope they are."

He swallowed a lump in his throat. His family was all dead. At least she had some semblance of hope.

"My Alice is a Dangerous type too," she explained. "I'm an Air user. At first I could only conjure up hurricanes and things, but now I can work on breezes and things like that. It's a bit weird, being able to do the powerful stuff more easily than the weaker one. Shizuka told me that it's because it's extremely difficult to control my powers, because I'm the fourth type of Alice—the more I use it, the worse I get. That's why I was always thankful that I ended up here instead of the Academy."

Natsume blinked at her and cocked an eyebrow. "But it isn't like there's really much of a difference. You have to fight here too. You still have to use your powers when they command you."

She turned surprised eyes at him. "Only if I want to. Shizuka, Reo and Yamazaki all told me that I had a choice. They could let me go if I wanted to, that's what they said, and I wouldn't be hurt or anything. But of course they told me all about the Academy beforehand. It doesn't sound very pleasant to me. What was it like?"

He looked sharply at her, wanting to snap that it wasn't any of her business, wanting to tell her that she was probing around and he really didn't want to talk about it. But there was something in her eyes that made him stop. _She really doesn't know. She really _wants _to know. And she wouldn't tell the others what I tell her._

He thought back to the times when he had been used on missions as security for whatever it was they were taking care of. "Painful," he said slowly, remembering nights when he couldn't sleep because of all the medicine he'd had to take and of missions that made him collapse afterwards (he never admitted that he _fainted_, because he swore to himself that that was one thing that was on his This-Is-Something-I-Don't-Do list, and in any case he usually managed to retain some vestige of consciousness). "But…" He thought of Ruka and Yoichi. "I had some friends there, just a few. And I didn't want to leave them behind."

"Then why did you?"


	12. Discoveries

Chapter Twelve: Discoveries

"Natsume's been kidnapped?" Ruka asked Persona suspiciously. They were assembled around a table: he, Mikan and Hijiri Yoichi were sitting listening to Persona. Mikan still flinched away from Persona, although Ruka had managed to swallow down his disgust and listen. "But that's impossible!"

"No, it isn't," Persona said. "I know that Natsume was furious with me for giving Mikan those pills, because he knows that they have… quite painful side effects. But she was very sick. Natsume's still a child. He didn't understand."

Ruka had to admit, Mikan looked much better now; the red splotches of color on her cheeks had faded, and her temperature had gone down. "But how could they have kidnapped him?"

"It's partly my fault," Persona said. "I should have gone straight down to headquarters instead of checking on Hatori. Natsume was desperately injured by the rebound of the barrier, and he was weak without his pills anyway. In that state, an Alice much weaker than Nagasaki Shizuka could have overpowered him. And Nagasaki Shizuka's talents are refined to a point where she could be quite a match for Natsume even when he's at full power."

"What can we do?" Mikan asked immediately.

"Nagasaki is no joke," he warned them. "She's very powerful. She might be controlling Natsume, manipulating him so that he doesn't know what he's doing. He might, for example, say that he left of his free will. But he would never have done that—he knows the consequences of joining the Anti-Alice organization. He would have to sell his own friends to the Alice traders."

She was silent for a minute. "No, he'd never do that," she agreed. "He cares too much about you and Yoichi, Ruka. And besides," she said, dropping her voice to a whisper that Persona couldn't hear, "he knows that Persona would hurt you if he did."

"I have a theory that if the three of you are the ones sent to rescue him, Natsume's will can overpower whatever hold Shizuka has on him," Persona explained. "I'm sending the three of you—it's the best chance that we have. Will you go?"

"Do we have a choice?" Yoichi asked. Dark shadows were permanently under his eyes. It was whispered that, a Dangerous Ability type like Natsume, he'd joined Persona's ranks at the age of eleven, just one year after his idol. His lips were stained white and bloodless. He had had his own fair share of fights as an undercover agent and knew the ins and outs better than Mikan did. The look on his face when he looked at Persona plainly showed cold mistrust.

"Yes, you do," Persona said unexpectedly. "I'm letting the three of you decide whether you will go or not. If you don't, I'm going to send in some of the high school students instead. I hope that collectively, they can take Natsume down. But that's assuming that the rest of the Anti-Alice organization won't step in during the fight."

"I'll go," Mikan said at once. Ruka and Yoichi nodded too.

"Good," Persona said with a smile. "You leave tonight."

Natsume was aware of someone tip-toeing around his room, or at least the one Saiko had led him to. He had been lying on the bed staring at the ceiling for quite a while now. He was tired, but he was thinking too much to even consider the possibility of getting any sleep.

"Who's there?" he said, sitting up.

Saiko looked up at him with a nervous laugh. "Sorry, I thought you were asleep," she said, putting down a pile of clothes on the table beside the bed. "Your clothes are all burnt, you know, so I borrowed some of Kazuo's things for you. You and he are about the same size."

"You mean the obnoxious guy with the white hair?"

She bit back a smile. "It's more of a silvery-yellow, really," she said. "But yeah, he can be a bit much sometimes, especially if you don't know him well. I should leave; you probably want to change…"

"He must be joking," Natsume said, lifting up a silk shirt with a fancy collar and black pants with silver running along the pockets. "He wears this stuff? Exactly how girly can he get?"

"Well… yes, he wears them. I don't know if anyone else's things will fit you, though. It's temporary. I can mend your clothes, if you like. I learned how to sew ages ago, when Shizuka taught me."

He nodded. "Thanks." They looked at each other in awkward silence before he shifted his attention back to the clothes that she had brought.

"Hey… do you mind if I call you Natsume?"

"Fine," he said grumpily, regarding the shirt with disgust. He regarded his own clothing with mild interest; the material was torn and covered with blood stains—not just his, he realized dizzily. With a disgusted groan, he pulled the shirt off over his head and tossed it away.

"Are you all right?" she asked him, moving towards him. She quietly picked it up, then recoiled slightly when she saw all the scars on his back. There were old marks there, but the fresh stripes of blood that blossomed against his white skin like haphazard swipes of paint made her sick to her stomach.

"Yeah," he said, brushing her off. "Just peachy keen."

Saiko came near him, concealing the trembling in her hands. "Wait, you have something in your hair," she said, picking out strands of blue thread. He recognized it as the remnants of the scarf Mikan had knitted for him, and he looked away. So it had been caught in the explosion too. _But I stayed up all night last week just to make it for you!_

"Thanks," he said when she stepped back. The proximity had made her shiver; he smelled of blood. She could taste the coppery tang of it on her lips, even though she'd already moved away.

"You should take a bath and change up," she said. "If you need to see any of us, just go to the common room. If you get lost, you can knock on my door—it's the one to the left of your room."

He nodded.

She paused before leaving. "Hey Natsume… don't be lonely, okay?"

"Huh?"

Her cheeks flushed. "Nothing," she said quickly, closing the door behind her.

The flush heating up Saiko's cheeks had barely cooled when she had gone back to the common room where the rest of them were entertaining themselves. Kazuo was playing darts with Reo and Yamazaki while Shizuka was sipping a cup of tea with Ayumi, the last of their circle.

"Don't get too close to him, Saiko," Shizuka said warningly the moment the younger girl sat down and reached for a cream cake. "That one could be a bit of a problem. Although I daresay that you'd be able to handle him in the end."

Ayumi smiled brilliantly through the curtain of pink hair that half-hid her eyes. "He's cute, I guess. Definitely the type that would attract someone like you, Saiko—you know, needy and dangerous at the same time. But I thought Reo said that he had a girl he cared a lot about. I believe her name was Sakura Mikan?"

"She could be put out of the picture quite easily," Shizuka said. "Hyuuga Natsume continuously convinces himself he doesn't love her. And anyway, Saiko, she's got nothing over you."

"I wish you guys wouldn't talk like that," Saiko complained. "It's embarrassing."

"But why not?" Ayumi asked. "I think it would be the perfect hold on him to stay within the organization. And besides, I think it would be great if all the Four Elements were bound together."

Saiko rolled her eyes. "That's just you and Kazuo, Ayumi. Leave me out of it."

With an indulgent smile, Shizuka handed her another pastry and refilled her cup, the steam rising above the cup in fragrant spirals. "But Kazuo pursued you before he and Ayumi became official, didn't he?"

Ayumi's lips pursed. "Yeah, that's right. You could have dated Kazuo if you'd liked. I never figured out quite the reason why you refused him, Saiko."

"We were better off as friends," Saiko said, shrugging. "And anyway, I knew that you liked him, Ayumi."

The other girl smiled. "Thanks," she said. "And—oh, heavens. Your guy looks amazing."

Natsume strolled into the common room, looking quite at ease in his new clothes although he had balked so much at them earlier. "Hi," he said, joining the girls and ignoring the guys, who hadn't taken any notice at his arrival.

Saiko's eyes widened when she caught sight of him. The clothes suited him, whatever he might have said about them. For once she thought that it was worth it—Kazuo spending so much money on his clothes—if people could look half as good as Natsume did at that moment.

_Honestly, Saiko, you're completely moonstruck, _Shizuka thought to her with an impish grin that made Saiko wince with embarrassment.

"Tea?" Ayumi offered. "And try the chocolate-chip scones, they're delicious. Saiko made them herself."

Saiko kicked her friend under the table. She had most certainly not made the scones (although she was proud of her skill at cooking), but Ayumi just smiled sweetly back at her.

"Thanks," he said, helping himself to one. "But let's skip the pleasantries. I need to talk to Ruka and Yoichi." He hesitated. "And Sakura Mikan too, I suppose."

Shizuka nodded, glancing sideways at Saiko, who kept a perfectly blank face. "Of course. Give me your hand, it's quite simple—"


	13. Conversations With the Enemy

Chapter Thirteen: Conversations with the Enemy

"Where did Persona say we were supposed to look anyway?" Ruka asked Yoichi and Mikan irritably. "Honestly, what does he expect when we have no idea where to start? I mean, we can't just go off on a wild goose chase through the country, and that's only in the hope that they haven't smuggled him off overseas!"

Yoichi tapped his chin with her forefinger, looking bored. He and Ruka were friends purely because of Natsume, and while he felt a sort of affection for the older boy, there was no denying that Yoichi was much cleverer than he was and was often exasperated by his and Mikan's lack of foresight. "Why don't you use your Alice then, Ruka? You could always use one of your gung-ho animal friends to pick up his scent."

"Oh." Ruka paused, then blushed, his white cheeks stained with shell-pink. "Right. I forgot about that." Then after a pause, he said, "But he teleported away. How can they find his scent that way?"

Mikan looked completely lost in her own thoughts. "Hey ugly, are you even listening to our plans?" Yoichi asked, poking her in the arm with vicious precision.

"I'm not ugly, and I _was_ listening!" she said with a yelp. "I was just wondering how Natsume is."

"I'm just fine, strawberry girl. I don't remember giving you permission to worry about me."

They all turned around, astonished to see him standing behind them, a sour expression on his face. "Natsume!" Ruka said. "But… Persona told us that you were gone."

"I am," he said. "Gone, I mean. Technically."

Then Ruka realized with a jolt that if he squinted hard enough, he could see the cream-colored walls through his best friend. "Oh God… Natsume, are you _dead? _Did you become a ghost?"

Natsume regarded him with amusement. "Wipe that look off your face, Ruka, I'm fine."

"An Apparition," Yoichi said. "And quite a good one, too. You're almost corporeal."

"Yeah," Natsume said. "Listen, I'm safe and well, happy, except for maybe the fact that I'm wearing some fop's clothes." They heard a faint protest in the background, and Natsume snickered.

"We're going to come and rescue you," Ruka promised. "Don't worry."

Natsume frowned. "What do you mean you guys are going to rescue me? I left the school because I chose to."

Mikan bit her lip anxiously, drawing blood. "They _are _controlling him," she whispered to Ruka. _Persona was right._ She turned half-angry, half-fearful eyes back to him. "Where are you, Natsume?"

She heard a girl say, "Natsume, your cake's getting cold. And besides, there's no way that you can tell them where we are, or Persona might come for you."

Natsume glanced over his shoulder. "Okay, okay, just a few more minutes, Saiko." He turned back to them. "Are you guys all right?"

"Just fine," Ruka said, confused. "But—"

"Good," he said finally. "That's all I needed to know." He waved at them and disappeared.

"That's it," Ruka said, shaking his head. "We're going after him."

"You know, I've noticed something weird," Natsume said, feeling strangely at ease with the rest of the Anti-Alice organization—well, the girls anyway; the guys were too busy cheating at darts to talk to him.

Not that he would have spoken to Reo in any case, now that he thought about it—arrogant tosser with his poncy voice pheromone Alice. "I thought I'd be fainting all over the place after that injury from awhile ago, but I feel just fine."

"Um," Ayumi said, through a mouthful of cake. She swallowed. "There's a very good explanation for that…" They all glanced at each other.

She stared at Shizuka, waiting for the signal from the older woman. _Go ahead, _Shizuka told her telepathically with an assenting jerk of the head. _Perhaps this will strengthen Saiko's case._

Saiko's eyes widened. _Oh Shizuka, you can't honestly—_

_Don't even bother trying to hide your thoughts from me, Saiko. I know every single thing that comes into your mind. _Saiko blushed. _I'll give you points for imagery, though. I didn't know that you could do that with a tea strainer— _

"Shizuka!" Saiko burst out, cheeks turning alternately red, then white, then a sort of rosy in-between.

"Could you guys stop talking in your heads? Watching you just looking at each other is kind of unnerving," Natsume said as though nothing had just happened. He wondered what they'd been talking about; watching them together, the three girls all banded together, was kind of unnerving. Ayumi was fighting back a smile.

"It's because of Saiko," she explained. "She told you she has an Alice of air, correct? It's because your Alice feeds off hers, like a flame needs oxygen to live. It's the same with me and Kazuo. I'm an Earth User, so he's—"

"An Alice of Water?" Natsume said in disbelief, shaking his head. No wonder they disliked each other on the spot, then. "I wonder if he's good enough to try me."

Saiko nodded. "Yeah, but he only joined us the year before last, so he hasn't been as well trained as the three of us. Ayumi and I were both here since birth, so we could use our skills together. We're all Type four Alices, but apparently when the four of us all get together, normal rules don't quite apply. It's a very peculiar situation. There isn't any precedent in Alice history about this."

"I don't recommend that you start attacking my boyfriend, though," Ayumi said with a grin. "He's really good at manipulating his powers, and water already has a natural advantage over fire. Although I have to admit he can be really arrogant sometimes… well, you'll get used to him eventually. Hopefully by that time you'll stop insulting each other's appearances."

"Why don't you join them?" Shizuka suggested, gesturing over at the three boys. Kazuo was guiding his darts along on jets of water.

"But he's cheating," Natsume complained.

"That's what makes it so much fun," Saiko said brightly.

Saiko and Shizuka scurried off to the kitchen to get more tea. "So, Hyuuga," Ayumi said with a critical eye, giving him the speedy once-over. "Looking good." She grinned, showing off her sparkling teeth in a perfect grin. "Saiko seems completely knocked out around you."

He sputtered, nearly spraying her with his tea (although somehow managing to retain that icy dignity while doing it—so _unfair_), and glared at her. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Oh, don't worry about it," she said, tossing back her hair. "I mean, Saiko's perfectly adorable—and I don't mean that in a gay way." She smirked. "And in any case, you're not the first guy to open up around her. You remind me so much of Kazuo, in fact. You were both pretty much the same."

Natsume's glare became even more pronounced. "Okay, now you're even worse—comparing me to that faggot."

"That's my boyfriend, you know," Ayumi said.

He looked at her incredulously and shook his head with a look of pity. "So, how did it happen?"

"Huh?" Her cheeks burned. How she had met up and gone out with Kazuo wasn't exactly a story she was planning to tell, but—

"You know—how did you manage to sustain such extensive brain damage?"

She laughed. "I like you," she said, reaching out and tapping him decisively on the chest, eyes still critical but full of admiration. "You can hold your own, can't you? You don't need anyone or anything. But even if you don't need her—well, Saiko's always been sort of there for all of us, whether you want her to be there or not. Not that I've ever seen anyone who didn't want her to be there. But I have to admit, I've never seen her go nuts over a guy before."

She wiggled her eyebrows mischievously. "Until now."

"Amazing," he said, shaking his head. "You're down here, you could do almost anything in the world, you're goddamn free to run around screaming 'I'm queen of the world' and you choose _matchmaking. _Honestly."

"It's lots of fun," she chirped sarcastically, curls bouncing. Underneath that whole innocent pink-haired, blue-eyed act, she was wickedly impish. "And I _have _run around screaming 'I'm queen of the world', although they got really pissed at me about that—apparently Kazuo was deep-conditioning his hair and the noise interfered or something like that. Saiko had more of a cause to complain—she had a soufflé in the oven, and it collapsed."

Natsume burst out laughing, and she grinned. "Just be open to it, okay? My matchmaking skills are legendary. I have a really good feeling about the two of you and I'll bet that you two will be getting it on soon enough."

He gave her a look.

"Okay, now you think I'm crazy. Here's probably the whole, 'hell-I-only-saw-her-a-couple-of-hours-ago' routine which I'm afraid to say Kazuo already beat you to. Gawd, boys are _so _typical."

"I wasn't going to say that," he lied.

She snickered. "Guys are so damn predictable—but that totally makes you adorable and oh-so worth it. In any case, haven't you ever believed in love at first sight?"

"No. I believe in luminous trousers and a lot of cash exchanging hands," he said sourly, draining his cup in one gulp.

"Good," she said cheerfully. She smiled, completely unfazed. "Hang in there, cowboy, and you just might get it."


	14. Turning Points and Memories

Author's Notes:

First of all, I can't believe I'm putting in an author's note. I hate doing this sort of thing. But I feel obligated to say thank you to the following reviewers: Ju-SanYumeEngel, canrolii, Typh, SnowMirage, Chibirei, and of course, the amazing Dear Julie, whose work I adore. If you like what you read, tell me! If you hate it, tell me anyway! (And I'll lambast you right back!) This chapter is dedicated to them, my regular critics who praise me way too much. Love you all!

Chapter Fourteen: Turning Points and Memories

_Just say yes already, _Shizuka thought to Yamazaki irritably. _Come on, I haven't got all day. Natsume and Ayumi area still out there chatting, you know, and she's making him remarkably uncomfortable._

Yamazaki laughed softly to himself as he watched Reo take a shot at the board. _But that's cheating, Shizuka. Don't you think that Saiko could nail him even if she took him on herself?_

_Of course she could, _she said with pride. She looked over at her little protégé—she was almost like a daughter to her, and smiled as she thought quite fairly that the girl was remarkably lovely.

As if on cue, Saiko turned her depthless, tunnel-like brown eyes to her, and Shizuka graced her with a slight nod before motioning for her to get more crumpets. _But that would take time. Hyuuga Natsume might not be here for very long—and he's pretty reserved._

_So now you're asking me for a love potion? That's just fine and dandy._

_I'm _not. _A love potion will wear off eventually—with death, at the very least. What I'm looking for is just something that will speed up the process. A dose of assistance, if you will, to something that could take months to achieve. But she would have done it herself—I'm sure of that much, at least. Come on—admit that even _you _were thinking of robbing the cradle once she turned eighteen. Saiko could have anyone she wanted—and she wants young Hyuuga._

His lips curved up in a smile. _All right. Top shelf of my hidden cupboard—the one under the sink, as you well know, you cheeky little rotter It's the pink one._

She ducked under the sink and rooted around, knowing that Saiko wouldn't ever touch Yamazaki's potions even if she'd known where they were hidden. _Got it. This looks really girly. How did you even make it this shade of pinky—and eew, are those sparkles? Ugh! I thought better of you! _

Kazuo and Reo didn't even look while Yamazaki laughed again. By now they were pretty much used to his telepathic conversations with Shizuka. _Oh, come on. As though it's my fault the recipe reads like that. _

Shizuka dumped the potion unceremoniously in a red cup—all the others were pink, so that she was sure Natsume wouldn't touch it in some misguided effort to prove his masculinity. She could read the boy like the back of her hand. Very carefully, she topped it off with a touch of tea and watched it turn reasonably brown. In any case, there was no hint of a sparkle in it, for which she was grateful.

"Here," she said, putting it and some cakes on the heavily laden tray that Saiko was carrying. "Need some help before I put away the rest of this?"

"No, I'll be fine," Saiko said. She wondered what Shizuka had been saying to Yamazaki—it had to have been Yamazaki; she could hear his laughter from inside the kitchen.

And she knew that Shizuka looked inside his potions cabinet and took something out, but she couldn't be sure what it was or what she had done with it. By now she'd trained herself to screw her eyes firmly up and try not to notice anything.

Natsume's head turned when he heard the kitchen door open, and Saiko stepped lightly out, her hands trembling slightly with the effort of keeping the tray steady. "Refill?" she said as she bent to put the tray down.

He curled his lip up at the sight of the three garishly pink cups with brightly painted flowers on them and picked up a dark red one. It reminded him of the color of wine, in fact. He took a sip and made a face.

"Too sweet?" Saiko asked him, dark hair fluttering down her face as she reached out to take it from him. "I'm sorry; I guess I put in too much honey. Here, I'll replace it for you." She reached out a delicate hand and brushed his slightly against his as she tried to take it.

Something seemed to squeeze painfully at his chest. "Um, no, it's not your fault," he stammered, feeling irritated as his cheeks flushed and he pulled away from her touch, drinking down the rest of his tea. "It's… great." Ayumi grinned wickedly at him from across the table.

Kazuo frowned with mistrust as the three girls and that Natsume boy cleared up the dishes. "Hey, you guys carry on without me," he told Reo and Yamazaki. "I'm going to have a word with Ayumi."

"Huh. Don't you mean you guys are going to sneak off to your rooms?" Yamazaki asked insinuatingly, wiggling his eyebrows with a smirk.

"Hooray for raging teenage hormones," Reo added as he tossed a dart at the board, hitting it squarely on the bulls-eye. He tipped him a wink. "Have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"Hey there," Kazuo said, putting an arm around Ayumi. Her eyes lit up and she kissed him on the cheek. "Hey there yourself."

Saiko rolled her eyes, but when she looked back at Kazuo they were dancing with mischief. "Could you guys not do that here? I just ate."

Natsume snorted with laughter, and Kazuo's smile instantly became a scowl. "What's the matter, Kitty Boy? I heard rumors along the organization that you have a girlfriend yourself."

Saiko shot him a look of death as Natsume flushed and stood up. "No fighting," Shizuka said lazily. "Hold your tongue, Kazuo; he didn't even say anything to you. Don't pick on him. And anyway, rumors are just rumors. Isn't that right, Natsume?"

"Yeah," the boy said. "And anyway, I'm really busy in the Academy, you know, I have to worry about lots of things, like managing to beat the pants off your organization members and figuring out ways to spend all the rabbits they give me, not to mention holding lots of kinky bake sales that involve Persona wading around in treacle with Mr. Jinno. I don't have time to go around necking people."

"Really? I thought all people made time for that," Ayumi said playfully. She turned to Saiko with mock-disdain. "Honestly, guys are so weird. Why do they think that insulting each other is a normal expression of social pleasantries?"

"Testosterones," Saiko said solemnly, "suck out all your brain cells."

Natsume and Kazuo both laughed, and then stopped as they glanced at each other in surprise—which set off Ayumi and Saiko, who both collapsed in giggles. "_Women,_" Kazuo said to Shizuka, turning his nose up at them disdainfully. "Simply _appalling _behavior, don't you think?"

"Do you talk like that for a reason?" Natsume drawled back. "Because the whole phony buttered British crumpet accent is really annoying."

"He studied in Britain for a while before he came over to Japan," Ayumi replied, snitching one of Shizuka's cigarettes and lighting it. To Natsume's surprise, she stuck it between her lips. "Which kind of explains the accent."

"I see," he said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "That also explains the outfit that I'm wearing right now. Now let me ask you—does he wear tweed knickers as well?" Saiko choked and turned pink with breathless laughter.

Kazuo scowled. "Oh sure, you three gang up on me. It's just like last time, you remember—that whole art… thing?"

Saiko's eyes widened. "Oh, come on, Kazuo. That's totally different. You know that that was a fluke."

Ayu nodded. "That was completely different." Natsume fidgeted as they started bickering over something that he didn't even know about. It was kind of awkward, to say the least, and instinctively Saiko turned and reached a hand out to him, drawing him into their circle. Her face crinkled up in a smile.

He felt suddenly dizzy. Her bright grin was intoxicating. It was so weird to see someone looking at him like that. It was in a way that Mikan could never have—she understood this side of him and she _accepted _it.

_Hello, cousin dear._

_Get out of my head, Shizuka, _Narumi thought to himself, but he knew that she didn't need to insinuate herself into his thoughts using her Alice. Her face floated up in the hazy surface of his mind no matter what he did to try and forget her.

There had been a time, years and years ago, when she had adored him. And everyone adored _them_—with their clouds of fair hair and pretty shell-pink mouths always smiling and letting musical, bell-like laughter escape from them. He would never forget the first time he'd seen her.

She was a fat little cherub of a child; by then he was already eight, and he poked a finger at her. Instead of letting out a wail, she turned her big purple eyes at him and with a wicked smile on her infantile face, kicked him in the stomach. He chuckled dryly to himself.

Then the image changed, twisting sharply to a later time, a different place; Shizuka's hands glimmered with eldritch flame, her eyes steady as they gazed on him. The fire illuminated her face. Exhaustion was etched all over her face as he blocked the path behind him.

_Shizuka, what did you do?_

_Don't look at me like that. Yamazaki gave me a potion—yes, he did; that's the fire on my hands. Touch me, and it'll kill you. _I'll _kill you._

_You wouldn't kill your own blood—_

_There is nothing that I wouldn't do anymore. Bit ironic, really—to be murdered by the person who swore to protect you. Mind you, you made that oath yourself, and you haven't exactly been the paragon of virtue about it._

_Where's Yamazaki?_

_Waiting. _

_Waiting for what?_

_Waiting for me. Waiting for you to leave so that we can get the hell out of here. Twig my meaning? Now get out of the way._

_Yamazaki sent you out here on your own to fight me? Not very chivalrous of him, I must admit._

_Hypocrite. It wasn't very chivalrous of you either to leave me to rot in that prison cell—not to mention Yamazaki. I wanted to come out here to face you alone, and he agreed only after I promised him that I wouldn't die. _Her lips twisted bitterly. _I won't die, because we're all already dead. I have bartered away my soul in exchange for something I never wanted._

_If you regret what you're doing…_

_It isn't what I'm doing, Narumi. It's what I've done. You and I and all the rest of us… we're all murderers. But you're the worst, even worse than Persona. What did he ever have anyway? What was he ever taught except to hate and to kill? You knew more than he did. You had more. And you threw it all away._


	15. Learning to Love

Chapter Fifteen: Learning to Love

"What _is _this place?" Natsume said, staring up at the towering bookshelves that seemed to stretch up infinitely upwards.

"It's the library," Kazuo drawled in a patronizing tone. He waved a hand airily around the room. "See all the books?"

"Shut up," Ayumi said, dragging him off behind one of the rows. Saiko chuckled and shook her head.

She reached out and picked a book from the shelves. "Those two will probably be bickering like mad for a couple of hours, and then they're going to kiss and make up. Literally."

Natsume looked around with interest, looking appreciatively at the cozy armchairs and neat walnut desks. "So this is where you guys all study?"

He walked over to the roaring flames and stared at the wood burning away into ash. The flames, instead of making him remember all those horrible things, flickered with yellow glitter and washed waves of warmth over him.

"Sort of," she said, replacing the book on the shelves. She didn't feel much like reading today; right now all she wanted to do was talk. There was so much to explain to him anyway, and she found talking to him so much more interesting than burying herself in musty pages.

"I guess you would think that since we didn't go to school—well, okay, Kazuo did; he went to boarding school in England and he _never _lets us forget it—we'd be dumb as doorposts and not know much about lessons and things like that. But Yamazaki's really smart at making us study. It's really annoying, how he can sneak lessons into the most ordinary things."

"Yeah? Like how? Does he suddenly go, 'Oh doodles, let's see how physics can be applied to cutting this doughnut in half!"' and things like that?"

"No," she said, laughing. "But I think I prefer your way."

He started to weave his way lazily through the shelves. "A Tale of Two Cities, The Bell Jar, A Christmas Carol, The Raven, Prince of Foxes, The Virgin Suicides—not exactly your bog-standard textbooks," he observed mischievously. "And why would you kill yourself if you were still a virgin and miss out on some of the best parts of life? Unless, of course—"

She put a hand over his mouth. "Don't say it."

His eyes sparkled mischievously and he nodded, and she let her hand drop back. "I usually study different languages, especially since Reo helps me out with them. I especially like reading French," she confided in him.

"Really?" he said. "You'll have to teach me sometime. I liked the sound of it, and anyway I hate not understanding people when they're talking. Makes it harder to make proper comebacks. Oh, okay, here are a few math books… they look like they haven't been touched for ages, they're all covered in dust."

"Well, of course they haven't been touched for ages. That's for preschoolers."

"Ah," he said airily. "Kazuo's department, then." Then he let out a little choking noise of disbelief before she could reply.

"Good grief—romance novels?" he said, looking amused as he pulled one out. "Tales of Kisses, Kats and Kanteloupe. God, their spelling is crap, but I guess that doesn't really matter when the plot is rubbish." He flipped its pages quickly, and his eyes widened and danced with suppressed laughter. "Whoa. I never knew you could do that with a cantaloupe."

Saiko peered over his shoulder with interest. "I've never even seen those before."

"Sure. And I'm the Hatheplae Goddess of Motherhood."

Her lips curled up in a smile. "I think I've seen an illustration of her in a book—doesn't she have six hundred breasts?"

He choked. "So. Not. The. Point." Then he paused. "There's such a thing as the Hatheplae, then?"

"Uh-huh. An ancient race of Alices created them. They were a mutant species of bunny rabbits."

"And now you're pulling my leg."

She grinned back at him. "You started it."

"Mmm. And you'll finish it?"

"Maybe."

"Maybe Natsume's okay," Mikan said anxiously. To pass the time, Ruka and Yoichi had morbidly (albeit involuntarily) developed a sort of 'Guess-What-Happened-To-Natsume' game, and it was starting to get on her nerves. She supposed that the final straw had been when Yoichi suggested that the Anti-Alices were holding him in chains over a pot of boiling acid while waiting for his resolve to break ("Classic, that one—pure villain tradition).

Ruka whirled around to face her, the falling snow powdering his hair and raising the color in his white cheeks to the shade of breaking sunset. "Of course he's all right," he said.

"Or maybe," Yoichi suggested darkly, "he's being fed to Bengal tigers."

Ruka shot him a poisonous look. "Oh, thanks, that's so reassuring," he said sarcastically. Then he added in a mournful voice, "I love Bengal tigers. Now I'll never get that image out of my head."

Mikan raised her face up to the sky, her brow knitting. "Are there stars out?" she asked after a moment.

Ruka looked at her in consternation as she continued to peer up while her feet kept moving forward. "Why?"

"It's dark," she said, groping in her pocket.

Yoichi looked away. The moon hung brightly over them, the stars glittering like pinpricks in the black velvet night. They weren't even completely out of the city yet; neon lights flickered off and on above them. She seemed not to hear anything, the roaring sound in her ears blocking out all else except for her efforts to listen hard to Ruka and Yoichi. "No," Ruka lied through his teeth, reaching his hand out to steady her and pull her out of the way of an approaching car.

"No stars tonight. You're right—it's pitch black. We could do with a bit of light. Do you have a flashlight, Yoichi?"

The younger boy dug silently through his small store of things and pulled one out. He flicked it open, casting a vivid yellow beam that cut through the night.

"Well?" Mikan said finally, as they kept trudging on. "Didn't you bring one?"

Ruka and Yoichi exchanged glances. "I must have forgotten it," Yoichi said gently, turning it off and replacing it in his pocket.

She finally pulled out another couple of pills and swallowed them—almost instantly, she could see the stars and the moon flaring brightly against the night, and she looked at Ruka and Yoichi and didn't say a word. She didn't feel any more pain when she took them, just a leaden sort of acceptance.

"It's getting late," Shizuka said, checking her watch. "You lot had better get to bed."

Ayumi groaned, her long fingers idly sifting through the pile of ash that had once been a whole pack of Shizuka's cigarettes. "It's only ten-thirty! Come on, Shizuka. We're fifteen, not _five._"

"I can count," the older woman said briskly, smiling at her. It was plain that this was an argument that they'd had more than once before. "But we have a lot to discuss tomorrow. And you lot all have training first thing after breakfast—if you feel up to joining the others, Natsume."

"Yeah," he said, just picturing getting to burn all of Kazuo's sleek blonde hair off that arrogant little head of his. There was a gleam in his eye that plainly said, _Christmas has just come early! _"Yeah, I'd love to go. Wouldn't miss it for the world."

"No, you can't do that," Shizuka said, laughing. "We encourage sparring, but nothing like that, please. Go to bed."

She reached out to the girls, who kissed her dutifully on the cheek—as though she was their mother. Even Kazuo, muttering unconvincingly about how he was too old for it, endured a kiss on the forehead.

He stared at them; he just couldn't help it. He hadn't exactly been completely alone. Ruka had always been there, ever since they were children. But come on—who was he kidding?

There was a period in his life when he could remember crying out for his mother and he would receive a horrible shock whenever he woke up and realized that no one would come. He knew that some people would have said that he was starved for love, and Shizuka turned clear violet eyes at him.

"We aren't being patronizing, Natsume," she said gently, kissing him on the cheek too, and gently smoothing his messy hair down in an oddly maternal manner. He was always guarded about touching other people; a brush of the hand, a tap on the shoulder, nothing more.

_Don't be lonely, okay?_

"Take care of her for me," Shizuka whispered very softly in his ear so that her words burned. He could see that the other three had retreated to a respectful distance. "I know she loves you."

"How can she?" he muttered back, fiddling with the buttons of his shirt. "She and I barely know each other."

Her lips curved up in a smile. "You know so little of love," she said. "No wonder you don't understand that love isn't bound by time or held by space."

"It's so cold," Mikan muttered, blowing on her freezing hands. The wind whipped at her hair; it was so dark that she could barely make out Ruka and Yoichi's silhouettes slightly ahead of her.

They'd been walking for ages; it had been all right at first, but then the neon lights of the city had faded into the obscure, snow-covered countryside. She wished that Persona hadn't insisted that they go on foot. Hadn't Natsume ever gone in a car or a boat or something? Honestly. Persona was mad as a hatter—she couldn't see what safety risks there were in making them go around in a nice heated car.

Yoichi gave her an exasperated look. "What did you expect? It's the tenth of November already, and you didn't even think to bring gloves?"

"What about you, then?" she pointed out. He wasn't even wearing a jacket; the thin, long-sleeved black sweater and black pants he wore made him look insubstantial in the darkness.

"I don't want anyone to see me," he replied, ducking his head and disappearing behind some bushes.

"Here," Ruka said, handing her his gloves and waving away her protests. "I'm not cold, go ahead and take them. You need them more than I do anyway."

She smiled as she pulled them on. "Thanks, Ruka."

"Hey Mikan, are you sure you're feeling okay?" he asked her, biting his lip in concern. "I don't want to pry… it's just that you've been looking kind of peaky ever since we left the Academy."

"I'm fine," she assured him, even though she was sure that she wasn't. Ever since that mission with Natsume, she'd felt kind of weird. The pills that Persona had given her helped a little, but she was felt nauseous. There was no way she was going to tell the two boys; they would definitely insist that they go on without her. And she wouldn't let that happen.

"Persona didn't specify much, did he?" Yoichi grumbled. "They at least managed to trace the Apparition, but only to a limited extent. "He said, and I quote exactly, 'Go North—oh, and Tachibana got the impression that there were some cherry blossom trees near the place'."

It had been annoying to discover that Persona had set a student with a Sensory Alice—Tachibana Hiroyuki—in the room adjacent to theirs, one with two-way mirrors, in fact. At least they'd been able to trace Shizuka's psychic signature to _some _degree.

He snorted. "Fat lot of good that does us. All we're going to have to do is go around Northern Japan asking where the Anti-Alice organization headquarters are."

Ruka shrugged. "We'll have to keep looking, then. The alternatives are to leave Natsume behind or to let those trigger-happy high school students handle it. You can take your pick, Yoichi."

Yoichi flushed. "Of course I would never leave Natsume behind. You know that, Ruka," he said in an injured tone. "But you have to admit… cherry trees up north? Where would we start looking?"

Mikan bit her lip and closed her eyes. Whatever was wrong with her was paring away everything but the barest of her survival instincts—she needed to finish this quickly, to find Natsume. She had the irrational belief that if they found him, she would be all right too, because surely everything would be all right if all of them were complete… Then she stared at them. "Guys... I have a question… do you know where Nagasaki Shizuka was born?"

Author's Note:

Okay, again I reiterate this: I absolutely detest doing author's notes. But the thing is, my friend has been bugging me to write a fanfic for a different anime/manga. And since I'm not getting enough reviews (hint, hint) I'm considering complying to her request. I won't be updating this fic until I get enough reviews to satisfy her that I'm actually getting somewhere with 'Of Daylights and Darkenings'.


	16. Vodka is the Answer

Chapter Sixteen: Vodka is the Answer

"Do you guys always do this?" Natsume asked them in a low voice as Ayumi giggled madly. The four of them—Saiko and Kazuo included—were in Saiko's room, munching on snacks and downing something that Ayumi mixed up, and which he strongly suspected contained vodka.

Saiko smiled. "Only on the first night of a new arrival," she whispered back. They had to be quiet, or else they would wake up Shizuka and the others, who would definitely send them back to their own rooms. "And we only started the tradition when Kazuo came. Ayumi and I, as I told you, have been here all our lives."

"Didn't… didn't you ever regret it?" he asked her uncertainly.

"Oh no," she said, eyes widening. "Never. They've been so wonderful to me. I make my own choices and live my life the way I want to—although I have to admit that they still implement a few rules like we have to go to bed before eleven and no fighting and so on, little things like that. But they're like… like family to me."

She was lovely, with the moonlight lending her brown hair a silvery glow—he noticed that she smelled distinctly of honeysuckle. She reminded him of someone, but he wasn't sure who.

With a slight smile, he drained his glass—it tasted sweet and sour at the same time. He'd never blamed anyone for choosing to become an undercover agent. That was his prerogative. But somehow it still felt as though he had been forced into it. And as for considering Persona his family… he let out a dry laugh.

"Hey, that's your fifth," Ayumi whispered to him, shaking her head as he poured himself another glass. "You're going to get a splitting headache in the morning if you don't take care."

Saiko giggled. She was just starting on her third, but she already seemed giddy and way too giggly. "Oh come on, Ayu. Don't tell me you've already forgotten Kazuo's welcoming party."

Ayumi's already pink cheeks reddened further. "You'll never let me forget that, will you?" she said with a giggle and a hiccup. "Come on, don't. The more people you tell, the more people I have to kill."

"You're drunk, Ayu," Kazuo said, shaking his head. "I'll take her back to her room for a bit, you guys, and then I'll come back and join you two." Bending down, he scooped her up into his arms. "Damn, you're light. How can you eat all those cakes and not gain any weight?"

"I," she said, drawing herself up with regal dignity, "am the Queen of Buckingham."

"Never mind," he sighed, shifting her to make her more secure. "You know, you deserve to be dropped on your head," he told her, planting a kiss on her cheek. "See you in a bit, Saiko. Hyuuga," he added as an afterthought before departing, grudgingly inclining his head a fraction of an inch at the other boy.

"I do believe you're starting to grow on him," Saiko said, smiling.

"Yeah, like a fungus," Natsume agreed. She laughed.

"Not a bad idea," Ruka was saying, unaware of glowing eyes in the trees. "How'd you come up with that?"

Mikan shrugged, lips puckered in confusion. "I don't know," she said, touching a finger to her temple. "I just had that thought of all of a sudden."

"Hotaru could look it up for us," Yoichi said.

Ruka raised an eyebrow. "Hotaru isn't here."

Yoichi rolled his eyes. "I _know _that," he said impatiently. "But you didn't honestly expect me to run off without giving some explanation of why we all left all of the sudden, did you? I told her all about it. She gave me these." He tapped at the panda earmuffs he was wearing.

"Oh. I thought you were just wearing that to look dorky," Ruka said.

"Ruka!" Mikan said in shock.

The boy looked ill and tense. "I'm sorry, Yoichi, I didn't really mean that. It's just that I'm so worried."

"You're not the only one," Yoichi said. He pulled down the mouthpiece of the panda earmuffs. "Hotaru?"

"Yeah?" they heard a soft, whispery voice come through on the other line. "What do you want, Yoichi?"

"We need to know where Nagasaki Shizuka lived when she was younger."

They heard a soft sigh and the sound of Hotaru powering up her computer. "Tell Ruka it'll cost him fifty rabbits."

Ruka spluttered and said something under his breath that sounded very much like "cluck you and your clucking rabbits", which made Yoichi snicker. "Opportunist," he grumbled. "Okay, okay, tell her I'll pay her when we get back."

Over on Hotaru's side, she was rapidly clicking at the mouse and typing madly on the keyboard. "She lived at 33 Willow Street in a village in the North. Turn left when you come to a fork in the road and then just walk until you get to a town called Touya. Then walk due east from there—pass by another town called Kiishimu—and then you'll get to her hometown. It's about fifty miles from where you are."

"How'd you know where we are?"

"I put a tracking device in the earmuffs, dummies," she said. "Call me if you need anything else, all right?"

"Are you mad that we left you behind?" Mikan asked anxiously. She'd meant to leave Hotaru a note, but then they'd just gone haring off after Natsume. Hotaru was probably pissed at her.

"No, I'm not. Someone has to stay behind and watch over you three."

Saiko's eyes were completely covered by her bangs, and she had been quiet for a while now. "Don't tell me you're drunk too," Natsume said, looking over at her. She bit her lip lightly.

"Natsume… didn't you like being at the Academy?"

He didn't answer for a moment. "No, I didn't. Not really," he admitted. His brain felt fuzzy and his tongue was thick and heavy. He suddenly wished that he hadn't drunk quite so much. "I wasn't all that happy."

All thoughts of Ruka and Yoichi were melting away, and all he could remember was that he'd run away from the Academy because the Academy was doing something horribly wrong—but he couldn't quite remember what it was. _I'm swearing off vodka, _he told himself.

She brushed her hair away and looked up at him, amber eyes reflecting the hungry, lonely look on his face. She set her glass down with a soft clink on the nightstand. "But you don't mind it here?"

"No, I don't," he said.

"Good," she said, flopping down on her bed with a huge yawn, eyelids fluttering. "I'm so… glad…" She reached out and took his hand with a smile. He flushed and looked away, but she mercifully didn't comment on it. "Training tomorrow… I'm glad… that you're here."

Outside Shizuka was sitting up drinking coffee with Reo. "Looks like Saiko's won him over," she said, taking a long drag on her cigarette with her eyes closed; her mind was elsewhere, dwelling inside the room watching Saiko and Natsume talking—her lips curved up into a smirk as she saw the infamous Black Cat blushing. Then she frowned. "But only to a certain degree. He still hasn't completely forgotten about his friends back in the Academy."

Yamazaki shrugged. "Well, Saiko's smart. We had problems with Kazuo too, didn't we, and she still managed him in the end. She's useful in ways other than her Alice. I wish we had other members half as persuasive as she is."

"I always wondered why she rejected Kazuo," Reo reflected. "They were inseparable during his first few months here. It seemed a shame at the time, although Kazuo and Ayumi look good together, now that I think about it."

Shizuka shrugged. "Saiko's Alice of Air pretty much cooperates with both Water and Fire. Ayumi's only works well with Water. I wonder if it doesn't have something to do with their Alice types."

"That's possible," Yamazaki conceded. Then he shrugged again, as though he wasn't interested in knowing at all. "But in any case, who cares as long as she binds him to the organization? Then he'll join us to fight the good fight."

"And as for Sakura Mikan?" Reo asked.

He smirked. "The Loss Potion ought to take care of that."

Author's note: Yes, this is probably the last chapter I'll be posting for a long, long while, since I'll be starting work on a new fanfic for a different anime soon... see Author's note in previous chapter for details why. Thanks to the few who posted their reviews for me. And no, I don't get drunk on vodka.


	17. Crossing Bridges

Author's Note: I am so, so sorry for the uber-long time this fic was suspended in nothingness. I've been incredibly busy (excuses, excuses) and didn't know what next to write. Anyway, I just wrote an extremely short chapter... but the more you review, the more eager I will be to update!

Chapter Seventeen: Crossing Bridges

"Watch where you're going," Yoichi said irritably as Mikan staggered into him. "What's wrong with you, anyway?"

"It's nothing," she muttered, brushing her hair out of her eyes. "I'm just a little tired, that's all. We've been walking for ages."

Yoichi shot her a disgusted look. "Well, you're slowing the rest of us down," he said. "I can't believe you would even think of sleeping, what with Natsume being kidnapped and all."

He looked unhappily down the long, winding road, wondering when they would come to that fork in the path that Hotaru was talking about. He hated to admit it, but he was so exhausted he felt like he would drop right that very moment.

But Natsume… he sucked in his cheeks, a nervous habit that was leaving them quite hollow. "Come on, let's keep going. And anyway, there's nowhere we can rest here, unless you guys fancy kipping out on the snow all exposed." He kicked at the snowy ground. "Just a bit further."

Ruka took Mikan's arm. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah," she said, rubbing blindly at her face. "I swear that I'm fine." She started walking again, swaying slightly and reaching a hand into her pocket. Avoiding Ruka's concerned gaze, she turned her back to him and swallowed two more of the pills that Persona had given her.

She'd been taking them every few hours, and each time she did she would feel Ruka anxiously staring at her. Persona had told her to drink them down every time she felt that she couldn't go on anymore.

Unfortunately, that was occurring more and more often.

They worked, at the very least. She smiled at Ruka. "Let's go. The sooner we get to Natsume, the sooner we can go back to the Academy." Then she stopped still in her tracks.

"What is it _now_?" Yoichi asked, exasperated.

"I feel as though someone's watching us," she said with a shiver.

"That's what they always say in the movies, right?" Ruka joked nervously, looking through the trees. "Right before some masked guy attacks the heroes with a huge chainsaw?"

Yoichi kept going. "How would I know? I've never seen a movie. Is it that dark thingy with the flickering screen?"

"All right, that's it," Ruka said, shaking his head. "Mikan's getting scared, you're being a pain in the neck, and I don't think that they'll be selling Natsume anytime soon. If when we get there we're too tired to use our Alices, they'd just capture us."

The other two hesitated. "Agreed," Yoichi said grudgingly. "And I am _not _being a pain in the neck."

aaa

"Morning," he heard a voice greeting him cheerily. Natsume groaned; bright light flooded his room as someone flicked on a light switch. "You'd better wake up, or you won't be able to join us for training. And anyway, Saiko made strawberry waffles with whipped butter. They are _not _to be believed."

Natsume felt as though every muscle was screaming in pain as he sat up. "Ungh," he moaned, even as he tried to stifle the involuntary sound. He squinted and made out a cloud of pink curls. "Ayumi?"

She looked at him with some concern. "Uh-huh. Have a hangover, don't you? Nothing like a little pick-me-up to solve that. And Saiko's got some really good hangover medicine. Kazuo's probably drinking his as we speak." She giggled. "Saiko and I never get them, even though we get drunk more easily, I suppose."

"Mmm," he said noncommittally as he swung his legs onto the floor. It was icy cold, but he padded across it anyway and noticed a pile of clothes on the dresser. "Those aren't more of Kazuo's, are they?"

Ayumi rolled her eyes. "No, even though I still say that his clothes aren't girly," she complained. "Saiko was up early working on yours. They're clean now, and I imagine that she fixed them up."

She looked at the clothes with a critical frown. "If you thought Kazuo's clothes were bad, what about you walking around in the Alice Academy uniform? We'll get you new clothes when we go shopping up in town sometime."

"You never mentioned where we were," he realized.

"We're at Nadeshiko village, Shizuka's hometown," Ayu answered. "Underground, of course. But the villagers know us—not that they know that we have Alices, of course, but… well, we're on fairly good terms with them. Kazuo and Saiko especially."

She made a face. "They're the darlings of the place. Saiko I can understand, since she's always frighteningly polite and syrupy sweet to everyone—it's enough to make you shudder, wondering where she gets all that extra gushiness from. But I don't get how the villagers can put up with Kazuo; he's always lording it over them and going on and on about how inferior the clothes are up there—honestly, we spend loads of cash just getting his outfits specially tailored."

"Really?" Natsume said absently as he started to enter the bathroom. It was too early in the a.m. to use any of the sarcastic remarks that were itching to roll off his tongue. "I guess."

Ayumi smiled slightly. "Hurry up and get dressed. Saiko's been waiting for you to wake up, you know." Her lips curved up even more, and her eyes danced with mischief. "Let's not deprive her of the chance to complain that you're not eating her cooking and getting too thin. She does it all the time. Especially," she added, "when she likes someone."

Natsume stopped in the middle of splashing his face with cold water and glared at her, daring her to repeat what she'd just said. "Sorry, I didn't catch that last bit. What was that?"

She giggled and tipped him an enormous wink before she left, calling behind her shoulder, "I said, 'See you at breakfast'. You know the way to the common room."

aaa

Saiko hummed to herself, hair brushing across her shoulders as she set a towering stack of waffles in front of Shizuka and Kazuo. "Juice?" she offered, placing the syrup jar in front of them. "I can make you guys some fresh orange juice or maybe apple, if you like."

"Apple juice please. Thanks. You seem to be in a good mood," Shizuka commented slyly. Saiko said nothing, but she knew that the older woman already knew everything. "Oh well. I don't really blame you."

Kazuo let out a grumpy, dismissive noise. He had come to her room last night to find her and Natsume talking, and he'd left. Saiko bit her lip and placed a glass of juice in front of him. She didn't have to ask him; she knew that orange was his favorite.

He tossed it down, then made a face as he tasted something bitter mixed in with the orange juice but instantly felt more alert; already his splitting headache was starting to subside. "You put hangover medicine in here, didn't you?" he said, sniffing the now-empty glass.

He felt okay mentioning his hangover in front of Shizuka because she'd probably read his mind anyway—and in any case, she wasn't quite as strict as Reo and Yamazaki in enforcing discipline. And those two could still be handled.

"Yeah, I did," she said briskly, whisking the glass away and now handing him another one. "That one's all right. I didn't put in anything with the orange juice. And," she added, wagging a finger at him, "is my cooking so bad that you won't eat it? You're growing too thin."

With a contrite little smile, he started attacking his waffles. The four-waffle stack had dwindled down to two when Ayumi came sashaying in. "Morning," she said sweetly, kissing him on the cheek. Saiko set down another stack of waffles.

"Aren't you going to eat with us, Saiko?" Kazuo asked.

"Mmm? Oh, in a bit," she said.

Ayumi smirked. "Natsume's going to follow us in a bit. He just woke up—and he was just as cranky as you were, Kazuo," she added.

Kazuo snorted. "You'd be cranky too if you'd had to put me to bed while I was commanding you to 'bow down to the Queen of Buckingham'. What is it with you and queens anyway? The last time you got knackered, you thought you were the Queen of Sheba, and the one before that, it was the Queen of Fairyland."

"Maybe I've got royal blood," Ayu suggested with a snicker.

"Clowns," Saiko said succinctly as she set down two more plates. "Aren't Reo and Yamazaki going to eat with us?"

"They left on a mission and won't be back until the weekend," Shizuka said. "I couldn't very well leave the four of you unsupervised, could I? It would be one big orgy."

Kazuo sat up straighter. "Why, is that what Saiko's thinking right now?"

Saiko let out a mortified yelp. "I am _so _not!"

"Actually, it was Ayu," Shizuka said with an evil grin. Ayumi stuck her tongue out at them.

Natsume watched them from the doorway with a lump in his throat. _Family. _Saiko hadn't been lying.

As if she'd heard his thoughts, Saiko looked up at him with a radiant smile and gestured towards the last place around the table. "Hey, Natsume, aren't you going to join us?"

Family. He walked slowly over, uncomfortably aware of Shizuka's eyes on him. "I… yeah, thanks."


End file.
